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The Lawsuit and the Counter-Documentary - Who the Heck is Funding All of This?

The question of the day is who is paying for all of this stuff?
The Lawsuit
Suing a wealthy corporation on a complicated issue is expensive. So far AC has filed a complaint, two amended complaints, and has litigated three different motions to dismiss. Think about how much it costs, for example, to have an attorney work a couple of hours on your will and multiply that by like 100 -- that's how much work has been put into this case and hasn't gotten past the initial round of motions yet.
AC has smartly brought in additional counsel with actual experience - probably $500/hour at a minimum. They also hired an expert who very oddly described how MaM used common techniques to favor a perspective (I say oddly because using common techniques sounds like the opposite of being reckless, which is what they were supposed to show).
Then there's discovery. AC is asking for ALL of MaM's footage. If that's 1,000 hours of tape reviewed at $100/hour, that's $100,000 in costs right there, and I'm using extreme low-ball numbers. Reviewing all that film for legal relevancy could easily cost half a million or more, and that's not even counting reviewing documents or costs of depositions. And we haven't even gotten to the actual trial, let alone the inevitable appeal.
It's safe to say Colborn doesn't himself have that kind of money, especially since he's claiming MaM did monetary damages to him. So he should have far less money than even the average career cop. What about taking the case on contingency? Even if Greisbach did somehow accumulate that kind of wealth as a small town criminal attorney, it seems pretty unlikely he bet his entire life savings on a lawsuit completely outside of his expertise on a topic he was already personally involved in.
Conclusion: An outside third party is funding this lawsuit.
The Counter-Documentary
We'll continue to call it CaM, although I guess it's just C now?
Obviously this project had to have private funding. I don't think that's in dispute. But is it funded by bona fide investors who believed it would be a good return on their money, or was it funded by people willing to take a loss for public relations purposes? It appears far more likely the latter.
I believe investors may have been able to make a decent gain doing a counter-documentary to MaM if they kept their expenses very low, geared it with entertainment in mind, and struck while the iron was hot. A hastily scrapped together 1.5 hour documentary released six months after MaM while it was still fresh on audiences minds might have made a decent profit. Maybe. Hiring an established name to put together a Roots long product released many years after MaM was popular on the other hand...
One thing that's always struck me as odd is that CaM planned to do 8 one hour episodes. Holy bejezus that's a lot of commitment to criticizing one piece of work. The new Michael Jordan documentary was freaking awesome (full disclosure: as a Tar Heel I'm a tad biased) and even that was hard to get through a similar amount of documentary.
Yeah, I know that MaM was similarly long. But even those who think it was extremely biased "pro-Avery propaganda" I think would have to admit that 80-90% or more was used on telling the story; a story that was so fascinating we're all still here today talking about it. CaM's presumptive version of the story, that a guy commits a senseless murder leaving all kinds of breadcrumbs to his door, leaves more than enough evidence for his conviction just lying around his property, and the cops simply took the better half of a week to honestly find any of it doesn't make for an entertaining story. My guess is they'll assume the audience knows the story, but in that case, they're spending the entire eight hours on criticizing a tiny portion of MaM. Dull overkill with little commercial value.
Other decisions also point away from a pure profit motive. No one trying to make money in the #metoo era is making Ken "Blow me or your abusive ex gets out of jail" Kratz as its feature personality. Additionally, a money making venture would have sought to secure a platform early, as all of the streaming sites nowadays take pride in their original content and would probably want input in the direction of the project. Meanwhile just hoping someone will want it seems like a huge gamble because Netflix doesn't want to criticize itself and its rivals don't want to further promote one of its biggest hits.
Long story short, all signs point to this project being funded deliberately as a public relations expense, and not as a capitalistic venture. (Although I do not contest that it likely has aspects of both.)
Someone or some group is spending hundreds of thousands of dollars, if not millions of dollars defending the reputations of cops and prosecutors in this case. As public relations in the modern world tends to commonly include social media manipulation, I encourage people to keep this possibility of astroturfing in mind when discussing the case on various social media platforms.
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I Read It So You Don't Have To: Secrets of the Southern Belle (by Phaedra Parks)

I hope the past few days have been restful and rejuvenating for you all, but -- as I'm sure you must have learned by this point -- the journey to personal betterment is an eternal endeavor. We haven't got a moment to waste, so let's bid adieu to the sunny serenity of the California coast and settle in down South with Real Housewives of Atlanta's Phaedra Parks, as she descends from her ivory porch swing and illuminates the esoteric in Secrets of the Southern Belle: How to Be Nice, Work Hard, Look Pretty, Have Fun, and Never Have an Off Moment.
True to the title's descriptive and straightforward sentiments, Phaedra begins the book with a concise synthesis of the worldview she hopes to present:
I believe every woman should be a Southern Belle or minimally aspire to being more ladylike, charming, and intelligent, because we should all be treated well.
As she continues, we get our first glimpse of the deep well of compassion that underlies Phaedra's mission to improve the lives of those around her.
Honestly, I sometimes feel sorry for women of northern persuasion. There they are rushing around in their baggy, drab clothes, doing everything for themselves and looking like they just rolled out of bed. They don't seem to understand there's a better way.
Thankfully, I no longer have to count myself among that witless horde. I feel like, until this fateful moment, I have been living like one of those people from the black-and-white "before" footage of an infomercial -- haphazardly bumbling through the most menial of daily tasks with no way of knowing how much brighter my world could be. Phaedra has freed me from Plato's Cave, and I have no choice but to follow her instruction and strive to shape myself in her image.
A true Southern Belle is known -- first and foremost -- for her fundamental kindness and compassion towards others, so it is only appropriate that the book's first section is succinctly titled, "Be Nice." However, even this simple directive has been trampled by the corrupting influence of the modern world. As Phaedra laments,
Unfortunately, as we see more migration from other parts of the world, we also see an increase of poor manners and rude behavior.
She elaborates, providing specific examples of the personal injuries incurred as a result of these unmannered interlopers.
I find it particularly odd in business, when the salespeople or tellers don't speak or thank you for your patronage. Don't they realize that without customers they would not have a job?
I, too, find it offensive when minimum-wage workers have the nerve to act like actual human beings rather than automatons at the mercy of my personal whims, and I appreciate that Phaedra is bold enough to ask the question that has undoubtedly been on the tip of our collective tongue. Yet somehow, she still remains humble enough to freely admit where she has room to learn; here, she lets the reader in on "something I've never quite understood about non-southerners:"
They're suspicious of basic southern warmth because they're worried it's insincere. But at the same time, they will tell you the most inappropriate things! They tell you stuff about their health that you don't want to know. They launch into crazy stories about their terrible childhoods and how misunderstood they are. They complain about what happened long ago, and they fret openly about the future. Then they tell you what they paid for things and you want to crawl under the table.
Frankly, that's not very attractive.
What is attractive, then, you may ask? Effusive compliments, for one thing -- "I don't know why some people are so concerned with being sincere, when being nice is so much more effective." We also learn to "never contradict anyone, even if you know they are wrong." Phaedra illustrates this particular lesson with the following example:
If someone tells you that your taxes are due on April 30 instead of April 15, you look puzzled and say, "Goodness, I had no idea. Did they change the date?"
And what happens after that? Either the person says yes and you're forced to play along with whatever bizarre delusion and/or power-play your companion is currently indulging, or they say no and you say -- what? "Right, of course, I knew that the whole time!" Or, "Gotcha! It's April 15th, you incompetent fraud!" Or maybe, "I don't even know what taxes are -- money is for menfolk!" I just can't imagine any of those scenarios playing out with less discomfort than a simple correction, but after four years living in New England, I can only assume that's just northern negativity clouding my vision.
We are next presented with a list of "compliments that come in handy," a few of which I've transcribed below for immediate incorporation into your own phrasal repertoire.
What an interesting way to think about it. (Good for a point on which you disagree with someone.)

You thought of every little detail; I love a meticulous lady!

Wow! That is so original. I would never have put it together like that. (In this South this might mean, "I hate it," but in a polite way.)
Boss Babe is out -- Meticulous Lady is in! Phaedra reminds us to keep health concerns -- "especially female issues" -- far from polite conversation, then shifts gears to a much-needed lesson in verbal comportment. It's not just their "attractive regional accents" that distinguish Southern Belles from their less-attractive northern counterparts; they also devote great attention to evoking grace through their cadence and tone.
Sometimes northern women can sound awfully abrupt. It's just a habit they have, poor things.
If you'd like to take your place amongst esteemed gentility, however, I urge you to change your ways! For one thing, when speaking, "slip in something affectionate so that a very harsh reality doesn't come across as rude or abrupt." For example, see how much unpleasant confrontation is avoided with the following turn of phrase:
Darling, don't you know you're too smart and pretty to be the town drunk?
Silly girl, haven't you heard? Addiction is for ugly people! You should also feel free to use these compliments liberally throughout conversation -- "You don't have to mean it, you know." As an example:
If you can tell that someone has put a lot of effort into a particular aspect of her outfit, just draw attention to it. Sparkly stars-and-stripes high heels could be terribly tacky, but you bet they're supposed to be noticed, so go ahead and do it. "Those are certainly patriotic shoes!"
Let me take a crack at it -- This book certainly has a lot of words in it! Writing a book is such an impressive achievement -- I'm sure it feels so rewarding to finally see it In print! And I love the way you occasionally use infinity signs as bullet points -- it's so evocative! I think I'm getting the hang of this!
"Another southern difference?" As Phaedra informs us, "we try not to make direct requests. It just sounds so forward and frankly unpleasant if someone comes right out and says what they want from you." Phaedra's Starbucks barista must really despise her -- If it isn't too much trouble, could I bother you for something to drink? No, anything's fine -- I wouldn't want to impose.
Almost like a modern-day Rosetta Stone, the next passage introduces us to the nuanced connotations that pervade a true Belle's vocabulary. For example, Phaedra tells the reader that "if I tell someone 'Goodness, you must have spent all day on your hair. I am so impressed!' it really means I hate it." Before I manage to convey how impressed I am by the book before me, I read on to learn that "when you're discussing a homely girl, you generally say, 'She's so smart!' The general thought is you can't be both ugly and dumb. God wouldn't be that cruel." Please excuse me while I take a few hours to re-analyze every compliment I've ever been given in my entire life.
Now that that's done, here are a few more translations to help you decipher the Belles in your life.
Belle-Speak: She's a nurse-in-training.
Unvarnished Truth: She dates only old men.

Belle-Speak: She's a butter face.
Unvarnished Truth: Everything looks good but her face.

Belle-Speak: Hope he's got money.
Unvarnished Truth: He's unattractive and pays for affection.
The second one is not even really a euphemism so much as Phaedra trying to demonstrate her knowledge of hip modern slang, but I digress. We transition into advice for conversation starters -- "don't throw them complicated or controversial subjects like politics, animal rights, or local zoning." Truly, I can't tell you how many times I've been approached at a party with an opener about municipal ordinances, and it just kills the mood like nothing else. Worried about how you'll ever find something to talk about under these restrictions?
Don't worry about sounding interesting. "Interesting" is an overrated notion. Just fill the empty air.
That…explains a lot, actually.
Our next lesson is in reference to dinner parties -- "don't make a fuss, unless you're complimenting the cook." In case you're confused as to how this guidance should be interpreted, Phaedra clarifies with some examples -- "'Is there meat in here? I'm a vegetarian' is the wrong kind of fuss." Since I typically ask this question while flailing my arms wildly and making intermittent whooping noises, I completely understand how it could be disruptive amongst refined company. Although I'm starting to get a bit nervous that I won't be able to keep track of these seemingly countless rules, Phaedra's next assurance puts my mind at ease: "If all else fails, remember the secret weapon of the Southern Belle is delicate helplessness."
In the next passage, we learn that, "if there's any characteristic that defines a Southern Belle, it's her habit of firing off little notes on any occasion." Just as with verbal compliments, these notes require little to no basis in factual reality -- "obviously it's perfectly all right to exaggerate." But while truthfulness is more or less dispensable, your choice of writing implement could have grave repercussions. As Phaedra exhorts, "Never, ever write a letter in pencil. You might as well not bother at all." Within the realm of pens, however, "blue and black are perfectly acceptable, even if they do lack panache."
We return once again to the topic of appropriate subjects for conversation, and are cautioned against asking anyone their age. Of course, wild speculation is encouraged, "as long as you're out of earshot." In the next tip, Phaedra declares: "Don't discuss the cost of anything. Any discussion of cost is just in poor taste." I just can't help picture how much of a nightmare this woman must be at a fast-food drive-through. Our final instruction?
Don't discuss hair color. Men always pretend they don't dye their hair, so you just have to go with it.
At first glance, this seems reasonable enough, especially in the context of the social graces espoused by the book so far. However, Phaedra's attempt at further explanation quickly begins to careen off-course.
For women, it's a little bit more complicated because you have the question of whether the drapes match the carpet, so to speak. And I do know some who dye the carpet to match -- that was the big thing in high school. Now with all this weird waxing, you don't have to do as much dyeing, but that's another thing you don't talk about either!
Let's see if I've got this straight: I should always believe a man about his purported hair color no matter what, but if a woman tries to lie about hers, she'll get caught…because I will inevitably be forced to confront the realities of her pubic hair? An intimate partner, sure, but I just can't imagine this situation arises with enough frequency to merit even the few lines its given in this text. And honestly, at this point, I don't even think I want to know what Phaedra means by "weird waxing."
This section of the book concludes with a final catalog of "the 'She did what?' mistakes." The list starts off strong with "wearing white to another woman's wedding." However, by the time we end on the most unimaginable of atrocities -- "drinking beer from a bottle" -- I'm beginning to wonder if this list was actually supposed to have been titled "things the sexy homewrecker does in a bro-country music video."
The following section is titled, "Work Hard," and I am immediately inspired to do exactly so by the implicit challenge thrown down in Phaedra's opening lines, in which she coquettishly asks, "Who always delivers a presentation on time, with the printed materials perfectly written and proofread?" I'm usually quite good at taming my most pedantic impulses, but contrarian passions I never knew I had are foaming at the mouth to find an upcoming typo and self-righteously call her bluff. Although perhaps I should find a more feminine way to phrase that; as Phaedra cautions, "we don't like to think of ourselves as driven, because that sounds so neurotic and unpleasant."
We next learn that "you cannot be a Southern Belle unless you understand what it is to be ladylike." But unfortunately, it is all too easy to be caught up in the ways of the world and lose sight of this primary calling.
A lot of women today enjoy being the feisty, brassy, foul-mouthed kind of gal who drinks with men and shows a lot of flesh. They think it's cool.
Phaedra continues and reflects that, "I've heard the argument that this is progress, from the feminist point of view, but I don't necessarily agree." I can never remember -- which wave of feminism was the one with all the feisty gals? But clearly, their agenda has gone too far! How, in contrast, does a delicate Southern Belle behave?
She looks as if she's heard of sex, probably has had sex, but has no plans to have sex with anybody in the immediate surroundings.
I'm not sure exactly how to convey this highly specific sentiment in any other way than purchasing a t-shirt custom-printed with the phrase, "I have heard of sex, have probably had sex, but have no plans to have sex with anybody in the immediate surroundings," so I hope that approach will suffice for now. Phaedra follows up by cautioning us that,
A lady never puts in the shop window what isn't for sale.
Personally, I like to think of myself as more of a museum than a gift shop, but to each their own! We next learn more about the delicate balance a Southern Belle must achieve in order to maintain her esteemed position. For example, while "she doesn't cuss and doesn't talk dirty," frigidity is similarly unbecoming -- "if somebody tells a good dirty joke in her vicinity, she'll laugh." I'm barely a third of the way through this book, and I'm already exhausted at the prospect of having to remember all of these hyper-specific edicts. It's no surprise that the Southern Belle has to remain consistently vigilant; as Phaedra intones, "coming from a Pentecostal family, I hate to see a woman down more than two drinks." It seems to me like the simplest way to avoid such emotional turmoil would be to simply refrain from compulsively tallying the beverage intake of strangers, but I soon learn there are far more perilous hazards lurking around every corner. Phaedra shares her personal strategy for avoiding the very implication of incivility in the following excerpt:
I don't ever go to the bar at a party; I think that just looks terrible. If I must have a glass of wine or crave a fruity adult libation, I'll ask a nearby man to procure it for me.
Sir! Procure me a fruity adult libation -- tout de suite! But I would hate to diminish the male gender by implying that they're only good for the acquisition of potables; no -- men can be leveraged in an increasingly broad array of day-to-day tasks. As Phaedra shares:
I have friends who have never in their lives pumped gas for their own cars. They will ask a complete stranger to do it for them. One of my besties from New Orleans will flag down a man, give him her credit card, and have him pump and pay for her gas.
Honestly, I can't help but wonder if this might actually be some kind of avantgarde performance art, in the tradition of Marina Abramović's Rhythm 0. Because the idea that this gambit has never gone horribly, horribly awry truly strains credulity. As I read on, however, I learn that my current train of thinking is sorely misguided.
Sometimes when I'm at a grocery store the fellow bagging the groceries will ask if he can take them out to my car. Why would you say no to this? But sometimes women do. And I look at them and sigh and think, "Poor thing. She has a lot to learn."
Thankfully for my personal development, the next chapter -- titled "A Crash Course in Being (Selectively) Helpless" promises exactly the sort of content that I so desperately need to understand. As Phaedra explains, a Southern Belle is "never intimidating, because some things she just can't do on her own." She goes on to offer concrete examples of how to incorporate this ethos into your life on beginner, intermediate, and expert levels.
Experts: assume help will arrive. Flat tire? Pull over to the curb, and don't sweat it. Can't figure out which wrench to buy at Home Depot? Or how to program your DVR? This is what former boyfriends and other gentlemen are for. Believe me, the age of chivalry is not dead.
Rent due? Don't sweat it -- a gallant gentleman likely already has a check in the mail. House burning to the ground around you? You should know a Belle doesn't walk down the hallway on her own two feet! Bear attack? I'm sure a male bear is just around the corner, ready to jump in and defend your honor!
Without a hint of irony, we transition to Phaedra's advice for the workplace. We learn that the quintessential gentlewoman is savvy, competent, and always at the top of her game. For instance, at her workplace, "she figures out how to work the coffee machine and the copy machine." With that kind of go-getting attitude, the Southern Belle will be bound for the C-suite in no time! Provided, of course,
She never does that thing I hear of in the North sometimes of telling you how little she paid for something. Why would you brag about bargains?
I can't hear the phrase that thing I hear of in the North in anything other than the voice of Tinsley's mother, Dale. Except she would probably use it in reference to something like "giving compliments to your daughter" or "weight gain." Regardless, a more appropriate question at this juncture might be, "Are you sure this book was proofread quite as judiciously as you claimed?" As I scan the page, my eyes happen upon the line:
10 percent for tithing, if your religion encourages tithing, which mines [sic] does.
Of course, it would be entirely uncouth for me to brag about my typographical superiority in this context, so now seems as good a time as any to exercise some of my newly acquired techniques. Oh, Phaedra -- bless her heart! I suppose we can't all be detail-oriented, can we? It must be nice to be so casual and carefree when you express yourself!
Without further ado, however, we move along to our next lesson -- "People don't know when you're hungry, because they can't hear your stomach growling, but they definitely know when you're homeless." To be honest, the more I think about this statement , the less sense it makes to me (people…can hear your stomach growling?). Luckily, with the jam-packed schedule of a Southern Belle, I simply don't have time to dwell on the issue for a moment longer!
Our next tutorial? " If you have one fabulous pair of shoes, you will wear them to church. It is the very least you can do for Jesus." As we all know, Jesus loves sweet kicks, so he loves nothing more than to see you rock the newest styles when you drop by on Sunday. And besides -- the higher the heel, the closer to heaven! Phaedra summarizes the Southern Belle's can-do attitude with the line: "We all may not be sitting around big ugly Formica boardroom tables, but we get things done." As someone who has only ever attended meetings held around moderately sized tables, I find this to be a validating sentiment.
When it comes to extracurricular pursuits, "beauty pageants are important." However, "as much as she loves performing, the Belle will not take to the stage: some of those theater people are just too peculiar, bless their hearts." Honestly, Phaedra and I come down on the same side on this one. But I will have to heartily disagree with her next passage -- with respect to traditions of stepping within Black Greek Life -- in which she states,
The traditionally white organizations don't have anything comparable.
Um, excuse me? Have you never seen this iconic video?! However, Phaedra does reassure us that she's far from ignorant in the ways of the world. As she states, "I have read about hookup culture and known a few easy women." Of course, easy men don't exist -- or at least, that's what I've read in all the most prominent textbooks regarding hookup culture. But don't mistake Phaedra's awareness for acceptance -- "that doesn't mean I like any of it." However, this sentiment is belied just a few paragraphs later, when our author recalls:
I offended the mother of one of my best friends once by booking some exotic entertainment at this friend's birthday party. My friend loved the anatomically exceptional dancer, but her mother was livid.
I'm sure that it was only your friend who loved the "anatomically exceptional" dancer, and I assume this must have been one of your aforementioned token "easy" friends, besides. A Southern Belle, in contrast, is interested in serious, long-term relationships. And for this purpose, "it would be much better to marry a young man that you can train. I have always said that I would rather be a babysitter than a geriatric nurse." Yet even these kinds of discrepancies seem trivial in comparison to the boundless passions of eternal love. As Phaedra shares,
I want Apollo and me to celebrate our fiftieth anniversary, so I try to overlook momentary annoyances.
That aged well. Bless her heart.
We're soon treated to a cheeky list of "what her husband doesn't know," which echoes several key themes from earlier in the book -- most notably in its bizarre fixation with pubic grooming.
He doesn't know what her true hair color is, because the curtains always match the carpet.

He doesn't know how often she waxes, or exactly what waxing entails.

He doesn't know that she has her own credit card, her own savings account, and a safe-deposit box.
I've got to say, that last one hits just a little bit different with hindsight. Always timely, however, are Phaedra's views on the importance of the homemaking arts. In this evocative passage, she describes the primal horror of an encounter with a woman tainted by an unimaginable curse:
A nice lady from another part of the country recently confessed to me that she doesn't know how to do any crafts. In fact, she said, she gets all nervous and antsy in crafts stores, because they're so full of things she doesn't understand. I laughed like I thought she was joking, but really, I felt bad for her. Imagine not knowing how to make all those cute objects that brighten up lives in the South! I shudder to think what the inside of her house looks like!
With that fable still ringing in my ears, we transition to the next section of the book: "Look Pretty." Phaedra reflects, "I am always shocked when I leave the South and encounter the enormous number of women who don't seem to understand how their clothes should fit." Now feels like an appropriate time to draw attention to the book's back cover, in which an open-mouthed Phaedra swivels her torso in such a way as to create a bulging protuberance across one half of her chest. In awe of her commitment to inclusivity, I now realize this could only have been an intentional choice to make herself seem more approachable to us northern oafs, and for that I am eternally grateful.
Phaedra goes on to inform us that, "personally, I prefer skirts and dresses over pants." However, although "high-waisted pants and pants with visible hem cuffs are quite elegant and ladylike," one should take care never to forget that "minimalism and menswear looks are just puzzling and not appealing to a Belle." I, too, must admit that I find menswear looks puzzling -- a girl? in boy clothes? I just can't make heads or tails of it! And this is far from the only contemporary fad that baffles the true Southern Belle. As Phaedra continues:
I've never understood the appeal of the natural look. It's so easy to improve your appearance; why wouldn't you take advantage of the many beauty aids available to you?
In a frankly unexpected dig against the ceramic arts, Phaedra notes that "unless you are a professional potter (and I don't think Southern Belles generally are), your nails need to be clean and filed." More generally, your physical proportions should remain mild and inobtrusive:
Ever since voluminous behinds became fashionable, I often see these lumpy, huge derrieres on women with legs as thin as a chicken's, and I think God would never put a rump roast on toothpicks, so why did you do that?
That's why I always caution my friends to pair their butt implants with a battery of leg implants, in order to really round out the overall contour of the body and mimic that structurally stable, God-given look. After all, as Phaedra quips: "'Knowledge is power' -- that's my motto." But this knowledge doesn’t come without a price; being as world-wise as Phaedra often requires direct confrontation with the atrocities of today's world. As she recounts, for example: "I was astonished to find out that not every woman possesses a lint roller." It's truly a tragedy to learn how the other half lives!
We are next informed that, "you have to have your ears pierced, but only one hole in each ear." The consequences for an infraction of this critical edict are left unvoiced, from which I can only assume that they are swift and merciless. Any self-respecting Southern Belle has a taste for the finer things in life, and Phaedra is no exception. As she remarks:
I love diamonds; I'd have a diamond duvet if I could afford it.
Because I am less fiscally endowed, I have had to settle for stuffing my duvet with assorted Swarovski crystals, at least for the time being. However, I'm eager to upgrade -- I can only imagine that the extra hardness of the diamonds will add a satisfying acupuncture affect to my nighttime regimen!
Phaedra moves on to fashion advice, and cautions the well-heeled Belle to remain conservative in her fashion choices. But don't worry -- there is a time and a place to let loose and express your more artistic side. Or, as Phaedra says, "something a little funky or ethnic may even be appropriate from time to time." To further illustrate this principle, she explains: "If I were going out West, for example, I might wear some turquoise bracelets."
But some things are a bridge too far! Any woman with a modicum of dignity would know never to be caught dead in "polar fleece," "a naughty-nurse costume," or "footed pajamas." We are also encouraged to carry around a hand fan -- "the elegant way to stay cool" -- as well as a "small leather-bound notebook for jotting down inspirations." I lose my train of thought for a moment, caught up in a daydream about the ingenious wonderings that must be contained within Phaedra's hallowed journal. But I'm brought back to reality by a declaration of "what's not in my purse," beginning with the stern pronouncement: "any kind of contraband substance."
Our pilgrimage to polite society continues with a comprehensive exploration of the monogram's social gravitas. As Phaedra intones, "I've even seen cars with a very discreet monogram on the driver's door." But with light must come darkness, and the next chapter bravely confronts an issue many others would fear to face: "Looking Like a Tramp" ("There, I came right out and said it," Phaedra breathlessly gasps below the harsh text of the passage's title). She gathers herself together and courageously reports, "some women look downright sleazy."
Alas -- even more tragically -- couture catastrophes are not restricted to those of legal majority. Phaedra heroically pulls back the curtain on a nationwide epidemic of wardrobe misconduct being perpetrated against society's most vulnerable:
I saw a picture not long ago of some hippies or hipsters or whatever you call them from some remote city. The parents looked the way you'd expect them to look, a little bit bedraggled, but the worst thing was they had this adorable little baby all done up in a black onesie. And as far as I could tell, it wasn't even Halloween!
How to combat this terrifying trend? Phaedra offers words of wisdom: "Little Southern Belles always look sweet and appropriately girlish." Specifically, we are encouraged to incorporate design elements like "tasteful, conservative rickrack." By way of further explanation, she clarifies that, "what they don't do is dress like Lady Gaga in dresses made of butchers' best cuts of beef." I'm disappointed to learn that my idea for an Etsy store selling bespoke meat-based children's clothing might be a nonstarter, but I suppose I appreciate our author giving it to me straight.
Another childcare commandment?
No costumes outside the house. Of course every little girl loves to play dress-up. But I truly dislike seeing Snow White or a fairy princess trailing along behind her mother at the Piggly Wiggly.
As she sits in her living room, most likely waiting for a man to come to her aid for some reason or another, Phaedra is struck by a sharp, blazing pain. As the flash of blinding torment subsides, she catches her breath and shakes her head wearily -- another costumed child has gone into a grocery store. Forgive their guardians, for they know not the harm their actions have caused to our author's delicate and genteel sensibilities.
But it does us no good to dwell on the darker side of life! Rather, we'll move right along into the book's final section, "Have Fun." However, this does not seem to be exactly the same kind of "fun" colloquially mentioned in mainstream circles. Rather, the Southern Belle defines fun with the principle, "everybody needs to know that you made an effort." For example, "if you're pouring punch into paper cups for a gaggle of seven-year-olds, put a spring of mint in it." My previous experiences in the general vicinity of children lead me to believe that at least 75% of the seven-year-olds in this group would respond to this elegant enhancement by dumping the punch out on the ground because it has a gross plant in it. Maybe that's part of the fun?
No analysis of Southern culture would be complete without a discussion of that most hallowed of pastimes -- college football. And although "only a really unusual woman watches football alone," it is imperative that a Southern Belle attend the social events associated with the on-season. What's more, she should take care to do with impeccable style. As Phaedra laments:
Sometimes I see pictures of women in store-bought football jerseys and I feel sorry. A store-bought jersey does nothing to flatter the feminine body.
As for the game itself, minimal understanding is required -- "Naturally a Belle knows how much men enjoy telling her things, so she isn't shy about asking questions." True to her generous spirit, however, Phaedra nevertheless provides a basic primer in the rudiments of the sport:
Basically each team is trying to get the ball through the tall H-shaped goalposts at the end of the field. […] The problem is that the ball can look awfully little from pretty much anywhere in the stands. There's no shame in watching the video replay to see what really just happened.
As a final tip, Phaedra suggests that "belles whose husbands have season tickets might even invest in matching linens and china." Our next unit of instruction concerns the arrival of a newborn bundle of joy; as we learn, "the birth of a baby is a big deal in a southern family." It's so interesting to learn all of these unique cultural details! I don't know if I've ever heard of another culture that places such importance on birth -- I'd love to get an anthropologist's take! There are also strict guidelines to which one must adhere regarding the naming of a debutante-in-training:
A Southern Belle's name:
-- is obviously feminine.
-- is two syllables or more (names like Ann or Joan seem abrupt, like so many Yankees).
-- is a real name, not a geographic feature like Sierra.
-- means something. Preferably something nice.
Once born and appropriately christened, children should be painstakingly shielded from the contaminating influences of the world at large. Phaedra explains that "pop culture is full of children behaving disrespectfully." Without the slightest suggestion of self-reflection, she goes on to declare that "besides, we think TV characters are basically tacky."
Phaedra reiterates a few of the courtship commandments mentioned previously, most concisely in the adage, "Belles don't date losers." And, as any suitor worth his salt should know, "a date with a Belle is no time for a boy to experiment with 'alternative' clothes or grooming either." Instead, a Southern Gentleman takes care to keep his language clean from distasteful or offensive language -- "For instance, why say 'liquor' when you can say 'adult refreshment'?"
As we near the end of the book, it seems only fitting that we take a few pages to cover the traditions and rituals associated with life coming to a close. Buttressed by her extensive knowledge of mortuary science, Phaedra instructs us:
Postmortem is no time to experiment with cosmetics. No one wants their sweet aunt Gertrude looking like some ashy Jezebel when she meets Jesus.
The passage concludes with the brassy observation, "we don't usually cremate in the South; we figure if we wanted to burn we'd just live recklessly and go to hell."
Before the book closes in earnest, Phaedra shares a few of her special, meticulously developed recipes. The most evocative of her culinary optimizations is a recipe for sweet tea, in which she thoughtfully informs us, "sweetness can be personalized by adding more water or ice to the tea."
The book's final pages contain an instrument designed to measure the effect of the preceding 252 pages on one's essential courtesies, charmingly titled "The Belle-O-Meter Quiz." As Phaedra explains:
So, ladies, how are you doing? I'm sure you've all been very attentive to my suggestions and are amazed by the results. You're probably totally used to a steady diet of compliments and flirtation and invitations. But here's a little quiz in case you feel the need to measure how far you've come.
If you'd like to take the full quiz, you can do so here. But if your busy Belle schedule doesn't permit you to devote that much time to something so self-indulgent, a few example questions are provided below:
Your routine greeting when you meet a new person is:
a. A surly glare.
b. "Hi."
c. "Well, hello! How are you today?"

If your gentleman friend brought you a corsage to wear on a date you would:
a. Put it in the refrigerator. Nobody wears corsages nowadays!
b. Pin it to your coat collar and check your coat.
c. Pin it in an unusual spot like your waist or behind your ear, after extracting one little blossom to put in his lapel.
The answer key informs us that answering mostly C's means that "you are a genuine Southern Belle." As Phaedra goes on to suggest, "maybe it's time to share your new skills with a friend and pass along this book. I hope it's been helpful to you." As a book hoarder of the highest order, I will have to skip that suggestion, but I am nevertheless thankful to move one step closer to self-actualization with the help of another Real Housewife. Until next time!
Upcoming plans in comment below!
submitted by efa___ to BravoRealHousewives [link] [comments]

Psycho Betting and Stats 301-Degenalytics Question

Before you even start watching this for entertainment and see if you get offended by this un-P.C. content. Don't be a pussy.
If you can't handle it, leave this thread. If you can, then you may proceed to the next level.
I've been scatter-brained, ire-filled, soul-searching and lost after a 7-day Degen Marathon that brought a shit load of misfortunes. I used to hate social media, but I've learned how to wield the soc. med. sword like a fucking Degen Jedi. I'm going to promote an honest cause where I seek to be victorious in the end. Just you watch you fucking doubters, haters, blockers, scammers. How much grit and intellect would the average fucking person have to endure what I've gone through in the last fucking 48 hours and still come out alive with a sense of greater purpose?
Had about $400 to $500 in righteously earned bonus dollars earned through impossible grinding degen mission that came pretty close to accomplishing (91%).
I would have had some imaginary >$600 BR by now, but instead the roll-over deadline caused the entire deposit to be forfeited and I manage to salvage some $100.
Due to a bonus rollover scheme, 80U of my balance was stuck in bonuses and if I fail to accomplish the roll-over by the deadline, it all gets forfeited.
With a $500-$600 balance, I could have somewhere at $900-1000 by now after a 20-2 W-L record on European football on Wednesday.
How did I get that record yesterday, by sampling a bunch of solid pre-game picks and live betting using my own fucking brain. I consult with the finest in capping. With $10-$20 bet sizes, That would have put me up maybe $15x16 = +$240 at minimum. $1000 was the imaginary bank roll. As of today, betting with $1 units, after Monday-Wednesday's successful run, while Tuesday was a -$50 blip, I converted $100 to about close to $200 (40U).
🤪🤑Psycho Betting🤑🤪:
I learned the art of psycho betting. Taking some well-advised 10U and 30U psycho bets that put my bankroll up a significant amounts, but a big loss does the opposite. Yesterday I manage to hit 4 grand 30U slams in a row, however many on juiced lines, so each $30 bet one returns about $15-20. Thus my bankroll grew nearly +100 units and sits close to $200 from the initial $100 I manage to salvage after that bonus robbery.
If you want to fucking learn the art of Psycho-Betting to the extremest and be successful at it, fucking put in $100 in Bovada (remember to use money that you can afford to lose) and get that fucking bonus for the purpose of looting the bookies in a successful vengeance scheme. This guy is a fucking Artillery:
Fucking hit more than 4x30U grand slams yesterday and some 10-20U cherries on top. I tailed his free picks and other through consultation [Haha fucking reddit/sportsbook will probably ban me for promoting another tout, :)].Of course with my $1.5U size on a crippled bank roll, I cannot grow it to as much as I wanted to using GoTime's techniques. I would have been at another +$400 if I had $6 units. It's a high risk and high reward system, but if you are confident with your picks you go big on it. If you lose it, then you grind back with smaller 10U and 20U bets to try to get back to part to be able to do another 30U bet. The goal is to be like 2-1, 3-0 on 30U grand slams a day. There is some level of sustainability and back up plans to execute in case the 30U bet did not work out. It is very improbable for you to lose 10 in a row on well researched picks that the experts in the community have common agreement on. A lot of the times, the lines shift to reward you less for the pick since big money is already on the pick.
Use the chart on:
Here is a Nice Calculation to do:
📚📑💻Stats 301 Question in Degenalytics💻📑📚**:**
Lastly I asked anyone in the past few days to do a Stats 301 question with Degenalytics Context: To fucking determine the probability that an avg Joe with a $100+100 Bonus Bank-roll or $500 + 250B bank roll can actually pull off the $3000/$7500 grind in some number of N months betting with supposedly 2 full months of real sports (N-2) getting Obliterated by COVID-19. I want you to give me an analytical calculation or a simulation of your work and give me all the possible scenarios.
Then give the final verdict of if that number converges to 0.000% or 100.00% that the average Joe would succeed his false-hope mission for a successful rollover.
In other words think of it like this: If the average joe bets his entire bank roll 12 or more times (roll-over is not x10 because of bookie juice), what is the probability that he will still end up in the green? Also assign a tilt probability factor that the Average Joe would go on some emotional tilt spree to end up bust again? And make it even harder by eliminating 2-3 full months of real sports (N-2.5) and having to bet on Bovada's limited shitty ass lines and shitty live odds.
If you fucking want to eliminate the -2.5 months, then allow the average joe the freedom to bet on N months of e-sports [hahah] and see where that goes.
I had a bad experience betting on e-sports for 2 months and only end up -15-20U. I'm not saying that I lost because I suck at e-sports betting or I tailed the wrong people. The Bovada lines are super shitty and limited. Most of the time, on live esports, all you see are dashed out lines as if they fucking know what the rigged result is and prevent people from doing hedge bets or try to bet opposite spreads when they are winning to guarantee an insurance 1-1 with minimal damage incurred to their bank-roll. The live betting experience on e-sports on the Bovada platform is so bad that you are guaranteed to lose in the long run. Fucking hell Bodog/Bovada even offered me a $250 deposit on 100% bonus after the Rudy Gobert day in Mid March. They advertised the joys and wonders of getting rich betting off esports.
I was so tempted to deposit, however I kind of over-slept and missed out on the dead-line so they closed the bonus offer. Pretty good relief that I did not fuck-up my real credit card and bank account by falling for that scam again. It was an accidental Grace of God moment to fucking avoid that E-sports deposit marketing scam.
BONUS Questions:
A: Calculate the number of months needed and number of successful bets required for the conservative degen 1u bettor to grind out the roll-over playing
$2.00 tug of war with the bookie.
B: Calculate the odds that a professional capper who knows how to adjust unit sizes (1u-5u), do parlays once a while, will succeed the roll-over in some
N-2.5 months or add some e-sports to have fun to keep the N factor.
C.1: Calculate the conditional probabilities for the bettor succeeding in the mission if on the first few days of betting:
i) He loses bet 1 for about $20.
ii) Wins bet 1 for about $20 to earn $17.5.
iii) Goes on a 3 game losing streak
iv) 5 game losing streak
v) Positivity case: The guy got lucky and nearly doubled his bank roll on a decent run from day. Up +100U or $200. [I'm sure that out of bad discipline the average Joe would still go -200U in the long run with a pretty high probability.]
C.2: Determine the mathematical scheme on how the Bookies can use your first few losses to eventually put you in a 60+:40- (Greater than 60% locked in bonus, less than 40% of your deposited money). Bonus:Locked funds ratio.
The Jinx-King answer: It converges to zero [hahaha], but I really am interested in know what other scenarios math and stats people have come up. And your mathematical approaches and formulae used to generate possible scenarios and probabilities. But I think it is safe to say that for the average Joe,the answer is 0.00% success rate. Bodog/Bovada knows this exactly and refuses to put a hiatus on the roll-over deadline. Instead they keep it going so that people can try to wager on e-sports and lose their entire bank roll. They are only interested it getting 100% of your locked funds so that they can buy expensive cruises, yachts, beach mansions, resort packages, etc in Aruba or some other tropical place. Where you got millions of desperate Americans, Canadians in struggling economies with lost jobs and zero positive cash-flow. About 10% or so or perhaps even more deposit money into off-shore gambling websites hoping they can roll-over their bank-roll some ridiculous number of times and make a few bucks to put food on the table.
In fact, it makes matters worst being jobless, having zero cash flow and having locked funds in scamming bookies. If you are not good at casino or sports-betting games, you would have:
A: Lose your entire deposit for failing to grind it out properly.
B: Not grind it out on time on whatever dead-line the roll-over was.
C: Even if you did successfully grind that shit out using conservative 1u betting and play $2 tug of war with the bookie, you will end up just wasting your time grinding it out for hours and hours on end. It would have been better for you to fucking find a job at some farm helping out with harvesting crops or work in meat plants so that food does not go to waste. I bet you I can make more money than your $2 tug of war in one a day picking off cans and bottles off the streets in some exercise walking/running/biking + collection routine then selling it to the recycling center for $0.05-0.25 a unit. Trust me at my university, I spot maybe about 50-200 empty/partially driven cans and bottles left on desks, lecture halls, the floor, libraries, work areas, etc. Supposed that I harvested that shit, I would be making $5-$20 a day collecting it all and going to the recycling center once every week.
The fucking company knows this COVID-19 closure shit and want to use it to their advantage to continue to rob millions of their customers. Last week, I tried to call customer service, chat help, email, etc. and management has spoken to plead my case to delay the roll-over dead-line in a pro-rated time frame so that customers with locked balances can resume betting with their full balance when Game 1 of any Major League Sport actually returns. They give me the same bull-shit over and over saying they decline my request. For what reason?
  1. The terms and conditions written in fine print for accepting the bonus conversion challenge. "Rules are Rules."
  2. They were aware my deadline of June 22 at 19:23 ET was approaching soon. They knew I was on a mission to salvage my bank roll before they yank out the 60-75U trapped in bonus balances (i.e. Ghost money). By the end of it, I realize I made a foolish mistake. Most of my wins were just from bonus money and I was rewarded $0.00 on righteous wins on expired bonuses.
Therefore Bonus money only earns bonus money which put my entire bank-roll in a 80:20 ratio where the bookies control 80U in ghost money. By the end of the roll-over deadline, they get to yank out 80U of my balance at the deadline and left me with about $100 (20U) bank roll to regrind.
  1. They knew I was winning consistently making solid picks.
During my 110 hour marathon over the brutal grind of losing more than 70 hours of work, leisure and recreation; 35 hours of sleep; to a fucking impossible grind of trying to roll over some 60% of $7500 on sports I have little knowledge of capping (i.e. E-sports, Table Tennis, European football) after a few days of studying the game, I was picking up my stride to grind it to 91%. They fucking knew that if I had another day to grind, they would be coughing up +$600-800 of withdrawable balance to my account.
I am a Fucking PHD Candidate (2-6 months from graduating and not having to pay another round of BS tuition) who does a shitload of mathematics, statistics, simulations, mathematical physics, wrote scientific papers. I've won T.A. Awards, Government/Provincial/Institutional level scholarships, Conference presentations, with even Undergrad honors back in the day. DM me if you need a fucking CV to prove my fucking credentials.
Why am I able to write a lot of shit? Because my fucking brain operates on some max level Intel Xeon chip on overclock mode and I cannot do much to shut it down other than going to sleep. They only way is to write articles that I think might benefit the community.
I have a crazy interest in sports and Degen'ing. I love to fucking put action on sports games, be proud about making the correct calls on the outcome of games before it happens, and then boast to my circle of competitive friends about who's the fucking Boss. As tabboo as society think us degens are, I think this absolute BS. There is a pure enjoyment in watching sports and having action on it. It is nice to get paid beer money to cover a round for your buddies, or earn that rent money over a successful night of betting on shit you actually enjoy watching. Fuck I rather make $300 for one evening of enjoying sports rather than working a 9-5 dull job to try to afford rent/mortgage. If I can fucking pay off all my monthly expenses in 3 fucking successful nights of 3 hr sessions of sports matches, that would be ideal. I would take the lather over a 9-5 rat-race grind.
Overall I am "PRO" in the debate for local single sports betting bookies to be established in Canada. Get these fucking scamming off-shore books like bodog/Bovada who contribute only contribute "Bagel" to the Canadian Economy, but instead make it worst by scamming the masses of hard working or desperate people to leak out some sum of billions of dollars of national GDP. Probably the same applies to all American States, that people should not have to cough up their hard earned $$$$ to off-shore scamming bookies. I shall write an article about this later to justify my arguments later.
Ultimately I my goal is to obliterate or negate the influence of all the cons, scamming bookies, and false touts out there who are just interested in stealing people's $$$. To write out full studies on exposing their schemes in an objective lens.
Calling me out: (Think I cannot track these pussy downvotes? I know you cowards 😂😜😎)
If you think I'm full of BS, then send me a personal DM to have a 1v1 argument the same way that Stephen A debates sports with Max Kellerman. You can downvote me or flame me with empty hate talk all you want on public threads. But don't be a fucky pussy by avoiding a debate with me. Trust me, I'm going to win and be the last one to state a real point that you will have no comeback for [haha]. Lastly, if you are open to discuss or debate with me about some issues, do some resarch/exploration, betting strategies, etc., I would love your collaboration in some projects I got going on.
Ultimately, I should help every honest worker strive towards Degen success or if not, just to purely enjoy putting action on sports games. If you are too full of yourself, then you are on your own, I bid thee adieu, and wish you all the best. However you will be absolutely declined to all services and counsel I work to provide to friends for free.
Social Media📺🎬
Some extra Resource to how I got to this point in my mission.
Here it is for starters:
June 23, 2020: The Impossible Pursuit Reddit/sportsbook/Brag and Bitch (Tuesday)
June 24, 2020: Doubling Bank roll and rewarded Bagel: Reddit/sportsbook/Brag and Bitch (Wednesday)
June 24, 2020: How can you win 5 in a row and lose it all simultaneously? Reddit/sportsbook/What is your most impressive win?
Full Twiiter:
All my media:
Discord: ????? To be solved.
Challenges: Got a few right in progress now and a couple of drafts I am working on.
The Jinxking Crusade (In progress):
Turns out many people cannot withdraw anything out of Bovada/bodog due to some website glitches. Will try to recover a bankroll to attempt a withdrawal, however I am likely to have the same issues too. They will make some lame excuse to not give me a cheque. Definitely no point of pursuing anything in bovada/bodog if they refuse to give you withdrawables. The goal is to get their website off outta here. As well as get them out of advertisements. They definitely pulled off some "Get the fucking money and run scheme" and you will likely not see your money again. GG
The Jinxking Challenge (In progress):
Want to expose a bad tout who over prices the service and has a mediocre record? Tail and fade to call their their BS or mediocre non profiting record out. Also good for finding legitimate winners too. This will be a mission to expose shitty touts on Twitter the way Penn & Teller exposes BS in the market.
submitted by jinxking0p5 to sportsbook [link] [comments]

What Free Bets Can You Get from 888sport?

What Free Bets Can You Get from 888sport?

Get 3 Free Bets from the 888sport Sign-Up Offer!

888sport is one of the best online betting websites, and it has many free bet offers. If you make use of all their bonuses, then you can even get a free bet every day. The website is not limited to sports betting. They have a casino, where you can play other games like well. Their sign-up offer is also not limited to free bets. You will also get a 10£ bonus that you can use at their casino. As for the free bets, you will get two with a value of 10£. These two are usable from any device and another one that can only be used from mobile devices.
To be eligible for this bonus, you need to meet some requirements.
• Create a new account. Like any other sign-up gift, you will need to make a new account to be eligible for this bonus. It must be your first account. If you already have an account, then you will not be able to make use of this offer. Do not try to abuse any offers because the website is able to ensure that you will not be able. It uses many different methods to ensure that no person uses the offer more than once.
• Deposit a minimum of 10£. After you have made the account, you need to deposit at least 10£. As mentioned above, only the first account is eligible for this bonus. So, if your card is already used for another account, then your deposit will not qualify you for the offer. Also, it does not matter if you deposit it’s higher because the value of the bonus will not change.
• Use the promo code. While making the deposit, you need to use the promo code 30F. Without using this code, you will not be able to get the free bets and casino bonus. Also, if you do not want to use this offer, but you still want to use this website, then you can simply make your deposit without using the promo code.
• Make a minimum bet of 10£. After you have made the deposit, you need to place a bet. You can make it on any of the sports markets available. Also, the minimum stake must be 10£. If the stake is smaller than this, then the bet will not qualify, and you will not get the bonus.
• The odds must be higher than 1.5. The last requirement is for the odds of the bet. If the odds are smaller than 1.5, then it will not count, and you will not get the free bets and casino money. If you passed all the requirements, then you will get the bonuses after the bet is settled.

Do You Want Daily Free Bet Offers?

888sport is one of the few betting websites that have free bet offers from which you can get 1 free bet every day. And unlike most other bonuses, you do not need to lose any wager to be eligible for this offer. All you need is to win a bet, and as a bonus, you will also get a free one. The value of the free bet is only 5£, but you can get one every day. So, you can get 35£ per week and more than 140£ per month in free bets from this offer alone.
So, what are the requirements for this offer? How can you get the free bets?
• Win a minimum bet. The first requirement for this offer is to win a wager that has a stake of 10£ or more. If you win it and you meet the other requirements as well, then you will get a free bet with a value of 5£.
• Odds bigger than 4. this requirement is slightly harder to meet. You will need to win a wager that has the odds higher than 4. But if you trust your luck, then you can participate in this offer at any time.
• Use the free bet within 7 days. It is essential to know that free bets are available only for 7 days. So, after you win one of them, then you need to make sure that you will use it in this period. Otherwise, you will lose it.

You Can Also Find Free Bet Offers for Your American ACCA Bets!
Do you like to place American ACCA bets? Yes? There are free bet offers excellent for you. 888sport introduced the perfect offer for you. You can get a free bet with a value of up to 25£. Unlike the last offer, this one works as a safety net. It means that if you lose your bet, then you will get a refund in the form of a free one. So, what types of bets can you make without being afraid of losing?
• American ACCA with 5 or more legs. To be eligible for this offer, then you need to place an ACCA bet in any of the American leagues. Also, the minimum number of legs is five. So, you need more than five selections to be eligible for the free bet.
• A minimum bet of 5£. You need to bet at least 5£ to get a free bet refund. Also, the maximum amount is 25£. So, all losing bets with a stake between these 2 values will get a full refund in the form of a free bet.
• Minimum odds per leg of 1.3. Keep in mind that every one of the selections must have odds higher than 1.3. if even one of them has lower odds, then your bet will not be eligible for getting a refund.
• Lose only one selection. Lastly, you will get a refund, only if you lose a single event from your bet. If you win all of them, then congratulations. But if you lose more than one selection, then you will not get a refund.
submitted by DanielMasonn to u/DanielMasonn [link] [comments]

Sports Betting Tips - If Bets and Reverse Teasers

"IF" Bets and Reverses
I mentioned last week, that if your book offers "if/reverses," you can play those instead of parlays. Some of you may not know how to bet an "if/reverse." A full explanation and comparison of "if" bets, "if/reverses," and parlays follows, along with the situations in which each is best..
An "if" bet is exactly what it sounds like. You bet Team A and IF it wins then you place an equal amount on Team B. A parlay with two games going off at different times is a type of "if" bet in which you bet on the first team, and if it wins you bet double on the second team. With a true "if" bet, instead of betting double on the second team, you bet an equal amount on the second team.
You can avoid two calls to the bookmaker and lock in the current line on a later game by telling your bookmaker you want to make an "if" bet. "If" bets can also be made on two games kicking off at the same time. The bookmaker will wait until the first game is over. If the first game wins, he will put an equal amount on the second game even though it has already been played.
Although an "if" bet is actually two straight bets at normal vig, you cannot decide later that you no longer want the second bet. Once you make an "if" bet, the second bet cannot be cancelled, even if the second game has not gone off yet. If the first game wins, you will have action on the second game. For that reason, there is less control over an "if" bet than over two straight bets. When the two games you bet overlap in time, however, the only way to bet one only if another wins is by placing an "if" bet. Of course, when two games overlap in time, cancellation of the second game bet is not an issue. It should be noted, that when the two games start at different times, most books will not allow you to fill in the second game later. You must designate both teams when you make the bet.
You can make an "if" bet by saying to the bookmaker, "I want to make an 'if' bet," and then, "Give me Team A IF Team B for $100." Giving your bookmaker that instruction would be the same as betting $110 to win $100 on Team A, and then, only if Team A wins, betting another $110 to win $100 on Team B.
If the first team in the "if" bet loses, there is no bet on the second team. No matter whether the second team wins of loses, your total loss on the "if" bet would be $110 when you lose on the first team. If the first team wins, however, you would have a bet of $110 to win $100 going on the second team. In that case, if the second team loses, your total loss would be just the $10 of vig on the split of the two teams. If both games win, you would win $100 on Team A and $100 on Team B, for a total win of $200. Thus, the maximum loss on an "if" would be $110, and the maximum win would be $200. This is balanced by the disadvantage of losing the full $110, instead of just $10 of vig, every time the teams split with the first team in the bet losing.
As you can see, it matters a great deal which game you put first in an "if" bet. If you put the loser first in a split, then you lose your full bet. If you split but the loser is the second team in the bet, then you only lose the vig.
Bettors soon discovered that the way to avoid the uncertainty caused by the order of wins and loses is to make two "if" bets putting each team first. Instead of betting $110 on " Team A if Team B," you would bet just $55 on " Team A if Team B." and then make a second "if" bet reversing the order of the teams for another $55. The second bet would put Team B first and Team A second. This type of double bet, reversing the order of the same two teams, is called an "if/reverse" or sometimes just a "reverse."
A "reverse" is two separate "if" bets:
Team A if Team B for $55 to win $50; and
Team B if Team A for $55 to win $50.
You don't need to state both bets. You merely tell the clerk you want to bet a "reverse," the two teams, and the amount.
If both teams win, the result would be the same as if you played a single "if" bet for $100. You win $50 on Team A in the first "if bet, and then $50 on Team B, for a total win of $100. In the second "if" bet, you win $50 on Team B, and then $50 on Team A, for a total win of $100. The two "if" bets together result in a total win of $200 when both teams win.
If both teams lose, the result would also be the same as if you played a single "if" bet for $100. Team A's loss would cost you $55 in the first "if" combination, and nothing would go onto Team B. In the second combination, Team B's loss would cost you $55 and nothing would go onto to Team A. You would lose $55 on each of the bets for a total maximum loss of $110 whenever both teams lose.
The difference occurs when the teams split. Instead of losing $110 when the first team loses and the second wins, and $10 when the first team wins but the second loses, in the reverse you will lose $60 on a split no matter which team wins and which loses. It works out this way. If Team A loses you will lose $55 on the first combination, and have nothing going on the winning Team B. In the second combination, you will win $50 on Team B, and have action on Team A for a $55 loss, resulting in a net loss on the second combination of $5 vig. The loss of $55 on the first "if" bet and $5 on the second "if" bet gives you a combined loss of $60 on the "reverse." When Team B loses, you will lose the $5 vig on the first combination and the $55 on the second combination for the same $60 on the split..
We have accomplished this smaller loss of $60 instead of $110 when the first team loses with no decrease in the win when both teams win. In both the single $110 "if" bet and the two reversed "if" bets for $55, the win is $200 when both teams cover the spread. The bookmakers would never put themselves at that sort of disadvantage, however. The gain of $50 whenever Team A loses is fully offset by the extra $50 loss ($60 instead of $10) whenever Team B is the loser. Thus, the "reverse" doesn't actually save us any money, but it does have the advantage of making the risk more predictable, and avoiding the worry as to which team to put first in the "if" bet.
(What follows is an advanced discussion of betting technique. If charts and explanations give you a headache, skip them and simply write down the rules. I'll summarize the rules in an easy to copy list in my next article.)
As with parlays, the general rule regarding "if" bets is:
DON'T, if you can win more than 52.5% or more of your games. If you cannot consistently achieve a winning percentage, however, making "if" bets whenever you bet two teams will save you money.
For the winning bettor, the "if" bet adds an element of luck to your betting equation that doesn't belong there. If two games are worth betting, then they should both be bet. Betting on one should not be made dependent on whether or not you win another. On the other hand, for the bettor who has a negative expectation, the "if" bet will prevent him from betting on the second team whenever the first team loses. By preventing some bets, the "if" bet saves the negative expectation bettor some vig.
The $10 savings for the "if" bettor results from the fact that he is not betting the second game when both lose. Compared to the straight bettor, the "if" bettor has an additional cost of $100 when Team A loses and Team B wins, but he saves $110 when Team A and Team B both lose.
In summary, anything that keeps the loser from betting more games is good. "If" bets reduce the number of games that the loser bets.
The rule for the winning bettor is exactly opposite. Anything that keeps the winning bettor from betting more games is bad, and therefore "if" bets will cost the winning handicapper money. When the winning bettor plays fewer games, he has fewer winners. Remember that the next time someone tells you that the way to win is to bet fewer games. A smart winner never wants to bet fewer games. Since "if/reverses" work out exactly the same as "if" bets, they both place the winner at an equal disadvantage.
Exceptions to the Rule - When a Winner Should Bet Parlays and "IF's" As with all rules, there are exceptions. "If" bets and parlays should be made by a winner with a positive expectation in only two circumstances::
When there is no other choice and he must bet either an "if/reverse," a parlay, or a teaser; or When betting co-dependent propositions. The only time I can think of that you have no other choice is if you are the best man at your friend's wedding, you are waiting to walk down the aisle, your laptop looked ridiculous in the pocket of your tux so you left it in the car, you only bet offshore in a deposit account with no credit line, the book has a $50 minimum phone bet, you like two games which overlap in time, you pull out your trusty cell 5 minutes before kickoff and 45 seconds before you must walk to the alter with some beastly bride's maid in a frilly purple dress on your arm, you try to make two $55 bets and suddenly realize you only have $75 in your account.
As the old philosopher used to say, "Is that what's troubling you, bucky?" If so, hold your head up high, put a smile on your face, look for the silver lining, and make a $50 "if" bet on your two teams. Of course you could bet a parlay, but as you will see below, the "if/reverse" is a good substitute for the parlay if you are winner.
For the winner, the best method is straight betting. In the case of co-dependent bets, however, as already discussed, there is a huge advantage to betting combinations. With a parlay, the bettor is getting the benefit of increased parlay odds of 13-5 on combined bets that have greater than the normal expectation of winning. Since, by definition, co-dependent bets must always be contained within the same game, they must be made as "if" bets. With a co-dependent bet our advantage comes from the fact that we make the second bet only IF one of the propositions wins.
It would do us no good to straight bet $110 each on the favorite and the underdog and $110 each on the over and the under. We would simply lose the vig no matter how often the favorite and over or the underdog and under combinations won. As we've seen, if we play two out of 4 possible results in two parlays of the favorite and over and the underdog and under, we can net a $160 win when one of our combinations comes in. When to choose the parlay or the "reverse" when making co-dependent combinations is discussed below.
Choosing Between "IF" Bets and Parlays Based on a $110 parlay, which we'll use for the purpose of consistent comparisons, our net parlay win when one of our combinations hits is $176 (the $286 win on the winning parlay minus the $110 loss on the losing parlay). In a $110 "reverse" bet our net win would be $180 every time one of our combinations hits (the $400 win on the winning if/reverse minus the $220 loss on the losing if/reverse).
When a split occurs and the under comes in with the favorite, or over comes in with the underdog, the parlay will lose $110 while the reverse loses $120. Thus, the "reverse" has a $4 advantage on the winning side, and the parlay has a $10 advantage on the losing end. Obviously, again, in a 50-50 situation the parlay would be better.
With co-dependent side and total bets, however, we are not in a 50-50 situation. If the favorite covers the high spread, it is much more likely that the game will go over the comparatively low total, and if the favorite fails to cover the high spread, it is more likely that the game will under the total. As we have already seen, when you have a positive expectation the "if/reverse" is a superior bet to the parlay. The actual probability of a win on our co-dependent side and total bets depends on how close the lines on the side and total are to one another, but the fact that they are co-dependent gives us a positive expectation.
The point at which the "if/reverse" becomes a better bet than the parlay when making our two co-dependent is a 72% win-rate. This is not as outrageous a win-rate as it sounds. When making two combinations, you have two chances to win. You only need to win one out of the two. Each of the combinations has an independent positive expectation. If we assume the chance of either the favorite or the underdog winning is 100% (obviously one or the other must win) then all we need is a 72% probability that when, for example, Boston College -38 ½ scores enough to win by 39 points that the game will go over the total 53 ½ at least 72% of the time as a co-dependent bet. If Ball State scores even one TD, then we are only ½ point away from a win. That a BC cover will result in an over 72% of the time is not an unreasonable assumption under the circumstances.
As compared to a parlay at a 72% win-rate, our two "if/reverse" bets will win an extra $4 seventy-two times, for a total increased win of $4 x 72 = $288. Betting "if/reverses" will cause us to lose an extra $10 the 28 times that the results split for a total increased loss of $280. Obviously, at a win rate of 72% the difference is slight.
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Reasons to Take Advantage of Paddy Power Free Bet

Reasons to Take Advantage of Paddy Power Free Bet
There is an increased number of betting websites and for good reasons. More and more people are discovering the advantages and features, not to mention the bonuses. Betting online is highly convenient and flexible and winning chances grow significantly. It is no wonder why many bookmakers want to take advantage of this market and offer access to a variety of games and excellent customer support. The Paddy Power free bet and 888sport free bet are just two examples of what you can obtain online.

What is Paddy Power Free Bet?

The Paddy Power free bet is offered to new members to attract them into the online betting world. Every free bet offers has its terms and conditions and it is best to know implications before making a deposit, to know for sure that it suits your style and your expectations. In some cases, people believe that the bookmaker will give them free bets without doing nothing and they can withdraw the amount, but it is not always the case. In this particular case, you can bet £10 and claim the £20 money back only if the first bet turns out to be a failure. The amount received can be used on the same game.
Claiming the bonus is fairly easy. You need to access the website and create an account. You have to enter some personal information and after registering, you can deposit minimum £10 using your debit or credit card, PayPal even. If you lose in your initial bet, you can receive a maximum of £20 risk free money back, in cash. The free bet is available for 30 days after claiming it and in case it is not used within the time frame, it will expire. It is important to know that not all deposit methods qualify for the free bet. For instance, Skrill and Neteller will not be taken into consideration.

What is 888sport Free Bet
The 888sport free bet is also a welcoming bonus and it has other implications, being a different bookmaker. After registering, you can obtain £30 to play on any market and the required deposit is just £10. It gets even better, especially if you are a casino enthusiast, because you will also receive £10 casino bonus. The offer is limited and you should claim it if you want to experience this website and enjoy all functionalities. There are various possibilities and different provider, but since they are all different, it is worth looking into what they offer and how the platform is developed, if it is user-friendly, if it convinces you to use it, and such.
888sport is a great platform and it offers access to many markets and features. There are so many ways to win and the best part is that it is fully licensed and regulated. This means security is in place and you have nothing to worry about while depositing and withdrawing money, giving your personal information, credit/debit card number, and such. To enhance the experience, the bookmaker offers useful resources that can help any person bet better and obtain the best outcome. If you are used to betting websites in general, you will have no issue navigating through this one.
Many people prefer looking into different websites to see how they look, what they offer and even create multiple accounts. Perhaps they enjoy the odds on a platform, but the markets on another. Maybe some want to benefit from casino games as well and like to combine experiences. The good news is that this is more than possible and new members can look up various free bets, including Paddy Power free bet , and claim them to test the platforms and find out which are worthy. No one says that you need to choose a single bookmaker, you are free to navigate online and test out all possibilities.
The Paddy Power free bet is appreciated because of the website as well. The bookmaker is fully licensed and regulated as well, including by international authorities, not only British and Irish. It is crucial to find a licensed bookmaker, to avoid any unpleasant situations and even put yourself at risk. This way, you have peace of mind knowing that you can place as many bets as you like and nothing will happen. Your money is safe and you don’t even have to get out of the house, since betting online can be done on various mobile devices as well.
Regardless of the sport markets people want to bet on, it is good to know they can begin with a Paddy Power free bet. At least in this case there aren’t too many regrets in case you lose from the start, because you receive extra cash in your account. There are so many sporting events and you can discover them by visiting the website, through the search engine or by scrolling. Online betting means that you have access to other bonuses as well, because bookmakers don’t focus only on welcoming offers, as existing members are not forgotten.
As for the 888sport free bet, it is one of the best ones out there and there are no complaint issues. After viewing other bonus offerings, you will not hesitate to sign up, as at any point you can discover new promotions and get the most for your buck. Not to mention that live betting is also a great feature worth mentioning, because in this manner you can get more of the excitement and bet while watching the game.
Since odds change, you can get the most out of them based on the game’s evolution. Obtaining the 888sport free bet is a breeze, but what is important to know is the validity. Within 7 days you need to use the bonus and the qualifying bet has to be placed within 30 days of the registration.
If you decide to enter the online betting world, claiming the 888sport free bet is a great way to experience what the platform has to offer and figure out if it suits your style and preferences.
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Discover the Benefits of Betting Online through Sportingbet

Discover the Benefits of Betting Online through Sportingbet
Online betting has gained more and more popularity throughout the years and nowadays, when people like to have convenient things at hand, it gets even better. There are many dedicated platforms for betting enthusiasts and it is possible to enjoy the best features, largest markets, the best odds and excellent customer support. Sportingbet and Racebets are just two examples if what you can find out there and they exceed expectations and offer great promotions.

Why Choose Sportingbet

To attract new members and keep them entertained and engaged, bookmakers have to offer different features and promotions. Welcoming promotions are a great way to incite punters and Sportingbet is no exception, because it offers some great bonuses. Everyone loves to receive something back once they make a deposit, more money to bet, and more opportunities to win cash. For instance, you need to register at this bookmaker, as a new member, deposit £10 minimum, place a bet at odds of 1/1 or greater and in case you lose the first bet, you will receive additional £10 back, to use as free bet.
Once you become a member on the platform, you have the opportunity to look around and explore functionalities, find out what markets are covered, if you like the style and the layout, and more. After placing a few bets, you will know if it suits your preferences and if it is the place where you would like to return. Considering there are so many possibilities out there, it is worth going through the best choices for betting platforms and decide if they are worth your time and money. Some of the most important aspects to look into refer to licenses and regulations, because they have to be safe and secure for all transactions.

What is Racebets
Some bookmakers focus specifically on certain markets. A good example is Racebets , directed towards horse racing fans. It is highly recognized among enthusiasts in the category and worth knowing. From the year it was launched, in 2005, it became a leader in the horse racing betting world. You can easily find races from across the world and navigate through the website effortlessly. The best part is that it is licensed and you don’t have to worry about security issues. Betting is safe and you can withdraw your winnings at any point.
As soon as you access the platform, you will find a high number of odds and you can take advantage of them immediately. Some of the features offered include live streaming, special offers, betting tips, and useful statistics. All this information is highly useful if you want to make the most out of the betting experience and increase your winning chances. Navigation is straightforward and you will easily find what you need. New members are welcomed with a bonus, to make the most out of the betting and enjoy more, even if you lose at first.
As soon as you start placing bets on Sportingbet , it is good to know that you can use the additional resources, such as predictions and statistics. These help spice the game and you will gain knowledge that will make the betting even better. Not to mention that mostly in all cases it is good to know something about the teams, players, and their past performance, because in this manner you can predict the outcome better and get the most out of your time and money.
Claiming the Sportingbet welcome bonus is easier than you think. It takes a few minutes to register and there are no complications. Of course, your identity will be verified, so you have to add a few important information. This is the bookmaker’s way of making sure that all members are eligible for betting and no rules are broken. After you receive the confirmation on your email address, you can log in, make a deposit using the desired method and follow the given directions to claim the bonus.
You can deposit whatever amount you want at first, but certain welcome bonuses require a minimum sum. It is a good idea to resume to this amount at first, just to test out functionalities and see whether you like the website and how it responds. On Sportingbet, if you deposit a minimum amount of £10, you will receive £10 back, as long as you place bets with odds of 2.0 or higher. There are no hidden rules, everything is simple and put in the open.
The welcoming bonus idea has been very popular around punters and many are looking for their offer when signing up as new members. It is understandable, because who wouldn’t like to receive something in return for their money. Racebets does not fail to disappoint and has its own welcoming bonus. If you deposit and bet £10, you will receive £20 free bets on international racings. Use the bonus within 45 days after registration, so it doesn’t become invalid.
Racebets accepts many deposit methods, but not all of them qualify to receive the bonus. It is good to know from the beginning that Skrill, PayPal, Neteller, Paysafecard and pre-paid cards are not approved and if you use one of them, the bonus will not be added to your account. There are other bonuses worth knowing about, because existing members are also awarded and respected. These will boost your profits and betting experience and keep you entering the website more often.
If you are passionate about horse racing and want to have access to races from across the world, Racebets provides quick access to them. In addition, you can find other markets as well, including Greyhound races, to top up niche markets. It is good to know there are so many possibilities and that every punter can find a dedicated bookmaker online that satisfied his/her requests. Online betting is a great way to make some money out of passions, predictions, and knowledge. Some do it for fun, while others invest considerably in the experience and want to gain the most out of it.
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How to Take Advantage of the Mobilewins Free Bet

How to Take Advantage of the Mobilewins Free Bet
Online bookmakers incite new members with welcoming bonuses and claiming them is a very easy process. If you haven’t discovered online betting by now, you will certainly feel more encouraged to do it when you receive special offers and access to a variety of markets, favorable odds, statistics and predictions. There are various platforms out there and they claim to offer amazing features. Mobilewins free bet and Boylesports free bet are good examples of what you can access.

What is Mobilewins Free Bet

Choosing the right free bet is not easy, because there are so many possibilities out there and punters simply care about the value, but not all of them read terms and conditions and what it takes to claim it. Quantity should not be the main decisive factor, because if you can’t get your hands on the bonus, then it is all pointless. Mobilewins free bet is straightforward and it implies making a deposit of £10 minimum and receive the same amount in free bets. It has to be used within 7 days, otherwise it will expire.
The UK online sportsbook provides access to multiple casino games, slots, and more. However, the platform specializes in betting and sports as well, offering fixed bets on markets such as horse racing, greyhounds, soccer, TV, politics, e-sports, and more. It has something for everyone and it is less likely not to find something to meet your preferences. The welcoming bonus is perfect to get punters up and running, offering a higher value for them to test their predictions and luck. You can claim the bonus and use it for an upcoming sporting event or on what is available at that moment.

Why Claim Boylesports Free Bet
The Boylesports free bet is quite substantial and claiming it is a breeze. Nothing is complicated when it comes to creating an account and you should be willing to provide contact information and some personal data. The bonus is offered to new members that make a deposit of £10 and place bets at odds of ½ or greater. Initially, they will receive £5, but this offer is provided up to 4 times, meaning a total of £25 in the end. After making the initial bet, it takes about one hour to see the amount in your account.
The bonus expires within 7 days, so it is a good idea to make use of it as soon as you obtain it and not let the opportunity pass. Certain deposit methods do not apply for the bonus, including Neteller, prepaid cards, and Skrill. Taking advantage of this promotion is encouraged, being a great way to know more about the bookmaker, if you like the experience on the website, the markets, odds, and more. Of course, there are ongoing promotions as well, as existing members are not left behind.
Many people appreciate the effort of bookmakers to offer bonuses and promotions, in order to attract as many members as possible. The Mobilewins free bet is very tempting and there are various offers released from time to time, especially during the holiday period. If you are a casino enthusiast and want to try the experience along with betting, the platform has a casino section. This way, you can obtain the best from two worlds, on the same platform and using the same account. It is more convenient and you can access the mobile application to bet and gamble on the go.
Aside from the Mobilewins free bet, there are other considerations to take into account when selecting a betting site. Its layout and design matters, the level and availability of customer support, markets covered, odds, if statistics and relevant data are provided, and such. How fast can you withdraw money? This is also important, because many complain on certain platforms that they are unable to get their cash out and they have to wait too long, days and weeks even. This is quite frustrating and it is not worth the effort, because online betting has to be enjoyable and convenient.
Punters need to pay attention to the time and money they invest in online betting, because they should get the most out of them and this is possible when you choose the right platform. It is not complicated and you can go through the process on your own or trust a website that reveals the top choices for online betting and casinos. They do the research on your behalf, present bonuses, deposit methods, reviews, mention if they are licensed and if customer support is provided at all times. Also, they explain how to obtain the Mobilewins free bet and point out terms and conditions.
The same principle applies to Boylesports free bet, because it is crucial to know what to expect once you commit to a platform. The website also has a mobile application, so feel free to install it on your mobile device and bet from any location. You can take advantage of live stream and watch your favorite horse racing and Greyhound races while they take place.
Boylesports free bet can be used on any sport available on the website, as long as betting odds are respected. You can find some standard sports on the site, such as American football and soccer, but also some distinctive ones, such as snooker and rowing. What is certain is that you will not get bored very soon and you will certainly keep your mind busy with all the games and events taking place at all times. Certainly there is something happening across the world and you can be there, in the middle of the action.
It is worth benefiting from Boylesports free bet from all points of view, especially since the platform is safe to use. Every punter needs to pay attention to where they bet and gamble online, as unreliable sources have to be eliminated from the beginning. The good news is that certain sources rank top sites and point out the ones worth knowing and testing.
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Why the 10bet Free Bet is Worth it

Why the 10bet Free Bet is Worth it
Free bets are a great way to test the online world of betting. Every new member has the opportunity to claim a bonus and make the most out of it, place bets and increase winning chances. Due to great convenience and flexibility, most people prefer to go online and watch games, enjoy live betting, use mobile applications and get the most out of the experience. Both 10bet free bet and Fansbet free bet are worth obtaining and the process is so simple and accessible to anyone with a valid email address and accepted deposit method.

What is 10bet Free Bet

In case you haven’t got a chance to experience online betting, with 10bet free bet it is more than likely that you will. Certain platforms require members to make a substantial initial deposit and they don’t like this aspect, because they don’t know if they will like the bookmaker, the markets, if they can withdraw money afterwards, and such. The good news is that 10bet requires a minimum of £15 to claim the welcoming bonus. This is convenient from many points of view and a great way to experience the website, the odds, make use of all resources and get the most out of online betting.
It is also a common practice to use a bonus code to obtain the free bets, but it is not the case with 10bet, for UK players. After you deposit the minimum amount, you need to bet with minimum odds of 4/5 and you will receive the bonus of up to £50. You need to claim the promotion within 30 days from making the deposit, otherwise it will lose its validity. Certainly this should not be an issue, as you can easily log in to your account from any location and place bets. There are sporting events all around the world, which means it is more likely to find some action and enjoy the platform’s functionalities.

Why Use Fansbet Free Bet
Another interesting offer is Fansbet free bet and this one is more straightforward and easy to use. The bookmaker wants to reward fans without too many complications, making them bet more and stay on the website to discover all features. The minimum deposit in this case is £10 and you will receive £5 as a free bet. The best part is that there are no clearance or wagering requests, so you can have the amount in your account and bet on whatever you like. However, it is important to note that the bonus and any winnings made from the bonus bet cannot be withdrawn until the wager requirement is fulfilled.
In order to attract as many members as possible, it makes sense for bookmakers to offer promotions and bonuses throughout time not only to new members. Loyal members are rewarded and not forgotten, because they are the ones constantly on the website, betting, depositing and withdrawing money. Fansbet has a wide selection of markets and odds on the platform, not to mention huge jackpots. Members have great chances to win considerably and increase their winnings through various ways. Add all these to the convenience of online and mobile betting and you could not ask for anything else.
Besides the 10bet free bet , there are many other promotions worth knowing, especially for those using mobile applications. Every user is encouraged to benefit from mobile applications, because in this manner they have access to thousands of monthly sporting events at their fingertips. Live betting is also a possibility and deposit methods are secure, so there is no question about integrity and safety. Who wouldn’t like to bet on the move? It is more flexible and enjoyable, especially because everyone has their mobile devices with them.
Free bets are highly appreciated, especially if you are aware of how to use them, you read terms and conditions and make sure there are no negative aspects to them. The 10bet free bet brings the opportunity to place bets without risks. There are notable differences between free bets and regular bets. The main one is that you will not be refunded the stake along with the winnings, in case the bet wins. Bookmakers use them to attract new members and allow them to explore their platforms, including making deposits.
With the 10bet free bet it is more likely that you will continue using the platform even after taking advantage of the bonus. Perhaps you will like the interface, the range of markets and odds, level of customer service support, ongoing promotions, and such. There are many other factors that influence the decision regarding a bookmaker and what convinces a person to stick to it or not.
The Fansbet free bet is easy to claim and there is no catch, as long as you know all terms and conditions and are fully aware of requirements on how to claim it. It is not enough to register and make a deposit, betting is still required and afterwards you will find the value in your account. You can view it as a great chance to test out sporting events and your predictions, if you are more likely to win in certain circumstances.
Not every day you receive a Fansbet free bet, so why not take advantage of it? With the minimum deposit required you can bet for a higher value and get to know the bookmaker better. It is up to you to decide on which sporting event you bet. Don’t forget that you can use other resources on the website, odds and statistics that can influence the final outcome.
This is a great advantage actually, online you have access to much more information and you don’t have to rely solely on luck. Knowledge is essential and you can use the Fansbet free bet to test it, establish strategies and think about ways to increase your winnings. There are many opportunities and it is worth taking advantage of them, because land-based bookmakers don’t provide them and online you have access to sporting events from all around the world.
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Free Bet Offers from Third Party Sites

Free Bet Offers from Third Party Sites
There are many different challenges that must be faced when it comes to betting on sports, but not all of them have to be faced without a little bit of help. Finding the best source for this is not an easy task because there is a lot of ground to cover and so many criteria to consider from the start. Focusing on free bet offers is the first step, but it is not the only one that must be taken into account. Many sites offer a betting bonus for loyal clients and this can be a welcome addition to the account balance. A little bit of help can go a long way and third party sources are ideal for it.

Free Bet Offers to Get Started

The first aspect most people think of is how they get started. This is why they are always on the lookout for the deal that will set them on the right track without a big risk from the start. Free bet offers are usually the ones that catch the attention of players. This happens because each of them is looking for a way to make money without investing or risking anything and sport betting sites provide just that. It is important to find out how these amazing deals can influence the activity.
The first task is to understand the mechanisms of the free bet offers. There are quite a few out there and each of them is stimulating, but first it is important to learn how they work. Some sites keep things simple and they match the initial deposit. This means the balance of a new account will be credited with double to amount they deposit the first time. It is up to each site to set the cap of this bonus and it is up to each player to decide which option is ideal for betting on sports.
Other sites reward players after they place their first bet, not after the first deposit. Some sites are able to take the risk of losing out of the equation. Their free bet offers imply returning the amount of money used in the wager if it is not a winner so players can keep on betting even if they lost. Other sites will provide additional free bet tokens once the first bet is settled. There are a number of sites that offer tokens adding up to double or even triple the initial bet to keep them active.
It is important to remember that all the offers players get from sport betting sites are meant to stimulate their habits. Each offer comes with its own set of terms and conditions and players are not able to withdraw the money until they have turned them over a number of times. This means they have to keep betting on games with certain odds until they meet the terms of the site. Once they do that, the amount will be credited to the account balance and it can be withdrawn as well.

Betting Bonus for Active Players
The initial goal of a sport betting site is to attract players. Once that is achieved, it is important to keep the players engaged in this activity and to place significant bets as well. The best way to stimulate players in this direction is to offer them a betting bonus for their efforts. As long as they meet the terms of the site, they are able to increase the balance of their account. There are a few ways through which a site can reward players for their activity. Here are a few examples for it.
First sites must make sure the players will be active. They are willing to offer a betting bonus for their activity, but they have to impose certain terms for it. The limit of the bonus depends on each site, but the terms they impose are usually: 1. A minimum amount of money that must be used in bets in a certain interval of time such as a week. If players live up to that, they receive free bet tokens at the end of the period 2. The odds of the games chosen for the bets. Higher odds imply higher risks, but they can also offer better winnings. Sites reward risk-takers even if the bets are winners or not 3. Specific sports chosen by sites. Most of them try to promote certain parts of their activity and a betting bonus is the ideal solution to direct players to less popular sports
It may seem like an easy task, but given the number of sport betting sites available over the web, this is a real challenge. Gathering all this information about each site and comparing the results is a task that requires quite a bit of time and effort. Making the right choice is all about research, but this does not mean the task should be handled without any extra help. There are a few sources that can take a load off your shoulders, but it is important to find the right ones for this job.
Some sites dedicate their activity to learning more about the activity of online casinos as well as sport betting sites. They centralize the data, they use a certain set of criteria to analyze each site and they are able to offer an objective opinion about each of them. This will make the research process a lot easier and it will lead players to a source that will rise up to their demands. This is one of the reasons why you should take the time to find the best source for information.
The initial free bet offers may be the first criterion for your choice, but every other betting bonus rewarded along the way can be a powerful incentive as well. Using the right third party site for the needed details will make the decision much easier and it will make the sport betting activity quite a bit more rewarding. This is the key to make the best choice from the start.
submitted by DanielMasonn to u/DanielMasonn [link] [comments]

Matched Sports Betting

You may be familiar with the phrase 'The bookie always wins'. This is true 95% of the time in my opinion, however many opportunities present themselves to change this if you are clever enough to spot them.
The average gamblepunter will place many bets during the course of a normal week, but few of them understand fully the concept of Value. This underpins everything that provides profit to just a few percent of us. If you place a series of bets over the Long-term and are constantly taking a price that is smaller than the real chance of success, you lose. Similarly if you always get a better price that the chance dictates, you will win over time.
Matched betting is a concept that has been around a while, however few of us seem to take full advantage. In a nutshell this involves opening a betting account in order to receive the standard 'Free bet'. Many sites will offer something along the lines of 100% matched free on your first deposit. You then endeavour to use these free bets to lock in a guaranteed profit regardless of the result of an event. Allow me to furnish you with a simple example...
Popular bookmakers Paddypower and Betvictor are currently both offering a £50 Matched Free bet. For the sake of this example I am going to concentrate betting on a couple of Tennis matches. Murray v Federer and Djokevic v Nadal. These provide an easy example as both matches have players almost equal in ability and therefore odds.
Firstly I open a new Betvictor account and deposit £50. I then place a £50 bet on Murray to win at 10/11 (potential return £95)
I then open a Paddypower account and deposit £50. I place this £50 on Federer to win also at 10/11 (potential return £95)
You'll notice that the total outlay is £100 with a potential return on either result just £95. This is of course where the lovely Bookie usually makes his money. It's called the overround and it guarantees him his few % profit regardless of the result.
However! If you remember we have received a £50 Free matched bet from each of the 2 bookmakers we signed up to. Granted these are not as good as real cash yet as they cannot be withdrawn, although what would happen if we now use them betting on the Djokevic v Nadal game?
Lets stick our Paddypower Free bet on Djokevic at 10/11 and our Betvictor Free bet on Nadal at the same price. One of these is going to win obviously, so we will get back £45 from the winning bet (original free bet stake is often not included in profits) add that to the £95 we returned from the earlier match and we have turned our £100 into £140 with about 5 minutes effort.
While this is an extremely basic example it does show you what can be achieved with the minimum amount of effort. Just recently I managed to sign up for 3 new bookmakers I had never previously used. I got a free £30 from one £25 from another and £40 from the third. Using a quick bit of arithmetic I managed to split my betting successfully between the 3 possible outcomes of 2 football matches and walk away with a profit of around £65. This took me no more than 15 minutes. With literally dozens of on-line bookies offering free bets and bonuses on sign-up you could easily make hundred, even thousands of pounds with this method alone.
submitted by PresentType to paddypowerinfomore [link] [comments]

Summary of sites that have helped me earn extra money easily this month

Hi there everyone :) I have made a summary of sites that have helped me earn extra money easily this month.
1) FruitLab: FruitLab is a site that allows you to make money by watching and uploading short video game clips.
You can record some short highlights from games you play on a desktop, console or mobile, upload them to FruitLab, and get points that you can exchange for items. For instance, Amazon gift cards (6250 points for a £5 gift card) and a Mastercard/visa card (25,000 points for £20). In the past, I have exchanged points for Amazon gift cards, and today I cashed out $200 (200,000) points via PayPal.
Alternatively, you can just watch videos and you'll get points for each video that you watch (usually 2 to 20 points per video).
Referral link (Earn 100 points):
Non-referral link:
2) SerpClix: SerpClix is an extension that pays you to make a Google search and click on a particular search result. To start earning simply follow the instructions below:
  1. The extension lets you know that a new search is available. 2) You click on the ordenotification (the extension automatically opens Google and copies the search term). 3) Then paste the search term into Google (CTRL+V) and click the search result that is highlighted. 4) You then remain on the site until the countdown in the corner is complete. 5) Once the countdown is complete the tab will close and you will be paid for the search. You can then complete your next order.
Payments are sent automatically each month by PayPal (minimum cashout is $5.00) and you are paid $0.10 for each search that you successfully complete.
Non-referral link:
3) LazyBucks: LazyBucks is a Chrome web extension that pays you to connect it to your Facebook account. You need a personal computelaptop/tablet, google chrome (to install their extension) and a Facebook account. For each week that you leave it connected to your account, you get paid $5 per week. You also get paid $5 for referring each person that successfully activates their account.
4) Football Index: Football Index is an app and site where you can buy and sell shares in football players. You can earn £10 by following these steps:
1)Register an account at Football Index ( ) and enter my unique referral code ( 492916 ) along with your details (The code must be entered to receive £10) 2)Deposit a minimum of £10. Once you've followed these two steps we should both receive £10 which you can use to trade or withdraw immediately (it takes a few days to reach your bank account).
5) OhMyDosh: OhMyDosh is a cashback site that has a "Lightning Payouts" section for payments that can be completed quickly. £10 is the minimum to cashout via PayPal. There are plenty of offers but below are some offers that you can complete to reach the minimum cashout without spending anything :
-Simply sign up:
Referral link (free £2 welcome bonus):
Non-referral link (no welcome bonus):
-30 Day Free Trial With Prime Video (Earn £4). If you already have an account you can use a new card and email address and it will work.
-30 Day Free Trial With Amazon Music Unlimited (Earn £2). If you already have an account you can use a new card and email address and it will work.
-Get A 30 Day Free Trial With hayu (Earn £2.50).
When you confirm your email you will receive £0.50 and if you complete the tell us what you want task you will receive another £0.50.
Good offers that you can complete to earn money quickly with some investment:
-Get A 1 Month Trial With Readly for Just 99P (Spend 99p but Earn £2.50).
-Get your 1st Graze box for just £1 (Earn £2)
-30-Day Which? Trial For £1 (Earn £1.50)
6) Wingo: You can now join the Wingo Card waiting list and receive a free $2 when they launch in Summer 2020 (they are accepting people from the UK, US and Canada). You can also earn $2 for each person that joins using your referral link.
To receive the free $2 sign-up using my referral link:
Non-referral link:
7) UpVoice (Similar to LazyBucks): UpVoice is a browser extension that pays you to check your social feeds regularly (for instance, your Facebook feed). The extension uses your data for market research.
You can earn $5/300 tokens for signing up and each day you will receive 10 tokens for browsing as you usually do. You can also receive 300 tokens for referring others (this is capped at 20 referrals/$100).
Once you reach 600 tokens those tokens can be exchanged for gift cards.
Referral link for $5 sign-up reward:
Non-referral link:
8) Zelf (Free €5 for joining waitlist - similar to Wingo offer): Zelf is launching in Spring and will offer instant, interactive banking via messengers, e.g. WhatsApp, Messenger, Telegram, Discord. For signing up to the waitlist now (pre-ordering) you will receive €5 starting balance on launch. You are only required to provide mobile number and name at this stage.
Referral link:
Non-referral link:
9) Testable Minds: This site is similar to Prolific. Lately, it's had a lot of studies with quite a few showing up. Whilst it varies, I usually complete a couple of studies each day (most studies tend to be in the $1-$3 range)
Payout can be made via PayPal (there's a small fee) or Revolut (no fee). If you become a Verified Member and join Revolut you will also receive more studies.
Referral link:
Non-referral link:
10) Midnite: Midnite is a new esports betting site. At the moment they are offering a free £20 bet when you bet £20 (with 1.5 odds) and sign-up using my referral code " LTedeschi ".
I made over £30 doing this offer.
Non-referral link:
Offer details:
submitted by LTedeschiR to beermoneyuk [link] [comments]

Slottica Casino 50 free spins bonus link (no deposit required)

Slottica Casino 50 free spins bonus link (no deposit required)

Slottica Casino Free Spins & Welcome Bonus
Join Slottica Casino and claim 50 Free Spins No Deposit Required. Our exclusive offer is valid for all new registrations. Plus, get a 100% welcome bonus and 100 gratis spins on first deposit. Good luck!
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Slottica Casino Review

Slottica is an online casino established in early 2019. Since then, it has been trying to make a name for itself? How successful these attempts are, and can you count on fairness and transparency? Let’s find out.
The registration took less than 2 minutes, indeed. The main page looks fine, and hopefully, some actions will be taken towards making the site more eye-catching. Navigation is not a bother, though. Games, Live Casino, Bonuses, Tournaments, and Lotteries tabs are found at the top of the main page.

Welcome Bonuses; Free Spins

Bonuses are our favourite topic simply because the bonus terms and conditions are a foolproof method for figuring out if a casino is trying to rip you off or it is doing everything by the book.
Slottica’s bonus page contains quite a lot of offers – free spins, 200% match deposit bonus, 100% third deposit bonus, as well as bonuses for every day of the week. Marvellous! However, each of the just-mentioned bonuses come with a 45x wagering requirement and a minimum deposit requirement that is a bit on the higher side. To take advantage of the 200% first deposit bonus, you need to deposit at least €20. That would have been perfectly fine unless the minimum deposits for the other bonuses weren’t in the range €80-€500. The high minimum deposits combined with the relatively high wagering requirement might be a dealbreaker for some of you.
The good news is that if you do not want to claim any of the bonus offers, you can deposit even €2.
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Slottica Casino Game Selection

As its name implies, slot games prevail at Slottica. Some of the titles we tested on your behalf include the Catfather, Dragon’s Gift, Magic Forest, Medusa’ Golden Gaze, Fortune Multiplier, Lucky Haunter, Rome Rise of an Empire, Empress of the Jade Sword, God’s Temple, The Slavs.
The table games section hosts a decent number of games – more than 10 video poker games as well as several Blackjack, Poker, and Baccarat variations. Oddly, the Live Casino tab is empty, and the live casino games are mixed with the table games. If you want an interaction with a real croupier, you can join a Roulette or Common Draw Blackjack table. Both of them are NetEnt-powered. We spotted Evolution Gaming in the list of game suppliers, so expectations are that Evolution titles will be added in the near future.

Game Suppliers

Slottica lends its games from a vast number of game suppliers – NetEnt, Microgaming, Novomatic, Amatic, BetSoft, Evolution Gaming, Ezugi, Booongo, Playson, Endorphina, Tom Horn, Lucky Streak, Pragmatic Play, Habanero, Thunderkick, August Gaming, Iron Dog, EvoPlay, Quickspin, Elk, Fantasma, 1×2, Rakki Games, Concept Gaming. You can filter the available games by provider. We think it is super convenient, but sadly, not many casinos have such an option.
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Deposits and Withdrawals

Depending on your country of residence, you will find different payment options in the cashier’s page. Some of the most common payment methods you will be able to use regardless of your location are VISA, Maestro, MasterCard, Neteller, and Skrill. The other payment processors you may have access to are paysafecard, Nordea, Rapid transfer, Qiwi, ecoPayz, Jeton, Perfect Money, Payeer.
Depending on the payment method chosen, the min deposit can be anywhere in the range €2-€10. The max deposit per transaction is €2000. The minimum withdrawal is €10-€50. The max withdrawal is €2000 per day, €10,000 per week, and €40,000 per month. Withdrawals to a MasterCard are not possible.
If you scroll down to the bottom of the main page, you will see Banka Havalesi, Hizli QR, and Garanti CEP Bank. Keeping in mind how heavily regulated all forms of gambling in Turkey are, we decided to consult with a customer care agent.
Sadly, we don’t have a Turkish friend to confirm for us how easy it is for Turkish players to make deposits and withdrawals to Slottica, but let’s jump to the next section where you will better understand our concerns.

Security and Licensing

Slottica is a Curacao licensee operating under license number 5536/JAZ. Slottica does not hold a UKGC license, but we had no troubles whatsoever opening a UK account. So, the lack of a UKGC license and the fact that it is freely promoting itself as a Turkey-friendly casino gives us the right to question its legitimacy.
Last but not least, Slottica does not have a list of restricted jurisdictions, which raises the question what happens if a player from a restricted jurisdiction opens an account, makes a deposit, requests a withdrawal and end up with confiscated winnings due to legislative issues?
Slottica T&C state that “In some countries online gambling is prohibited by law. You understand and accept that the Company can`t provide you with legal advice or guarantee the legitimacy of Site use. You use our services all by yourself and take full responsibility about the legalization of online-gambling in your country.”
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Slottica Mobile Casino

Slottica games run well on mobiles, but keep in mind that the mobile version features fewer titles than the desktop one. Still, you have plenty of slots to enjoy on the go.
The bottom line
We have mixed feelings about Slottica casino. It has a large slots library, but the bonus terms and conditions are not player-friendly. The lack of proper licensing and regulation is also a bother. The fact that the site is translated into Turkish, Russian, and Polish, means that Slottica accepts players from these countries. However, all three of them have very restrictive online gambling laws and impose severe penalties on unlicensed providers. To cut a long story short, we always recommend our readers to open accounts at safe, regulated casinos where fairness and security cannot be questioned.
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submitted by freespinsgratis_com to u/freespinsgratis_com [link] [comments]

Paddy Power - Another £5 Free Bet For Ascot Today

For those of you with an existing Paddy Power account, there is another £5 free bet available to claim for the 13:50 at Ascot today.
It is highly likely that this will run for everyday of the festival, so check each day as that could result in a further £15 of free bets.
Also, incase you missed the other post yesterday, there is also a £5 free bet to claim for the Arsenal vs Manchester City match tonight.

If you don't have an account you can register one here:
Ref | Non-Ref

To claim the free bet, New users must deposit a minimum of £5 via debit card or apple pay.

Referral bonus is either:
Bet £10, Get £10 and 20 Free Spins
Min £10 Sportsbook bet at odds of at least 1.5 (1/2). £10 Free bet is valid for 30 days, must be used on a Sportsbook market & will be awarded after the qualifying bet has been settled. 20 Free Spins can be claimed from the promotions hub after bet settlement. Must be used on Paddy Power Gold Megaways, valued at £0.10 per spin & are valid for 3 days. 

Get 150 Free Spins when you bet £5 on PP Gold Megaways
Get a 150 Free Spins on Paddy Power Gold Megaways once you bet a minimum of £5 on the game. Free Spins are valued at £0.10 each and expire after 72 hours. Min £5 deposit via Credit/Debit Card or ApplePay. 
submitted by sucking_on_chodes to beermoneyuk [link] [comments]

Strategies and Tips to play an online casino game

People will prefer to play online casinos because of the challenges that come with the game. The best part of the casino is, you can also earn money by playing this game. Some tips and tricks that you have to follow when you are playing online casino games.
It is not every online casino outside there that fantastic that you play with. A few are simply soon after swindling you personally and evaporate into nothing. You must pick a respectable casino, the one who may honor their sentence. This kind of online casino ought to have the ability to fulfill your wins normally as you possibly can. You also ought to be certain the casino you pick is dependable and was qualified by different regulatory jurisdictions.
That was just an expression within the gambling universe, “gaming doesn’t mix alcohol” That really is the case as you wind up generating decisions that are dreadful. Make certain you don’t simply take alcohol since you move into play with it. You may have a jar or two when you have won is a style of observing.
In the the event that you were able to swing the match chances on your favor, then you then definitely can be an everyday winner. All you desire would be always to have a while to know about the matches and approaches utilized to deny you for a triumph. Discover to counteract such plans, and you will never eliminate your stakes.
You are perhaps not being duped with lots of bonuses and gifts from several online casinos. The things they have been doing will be always to bring one to conduct business using them. Proceed up ahead of time and choose the gift suggestions and elevate your odds to get a triumph. Like a gamer, you just deserve those presents, and thus there’s not anything to be scared of. Online casinos provide welcome bonuses and promotions that are succulent. You need to browse the terms of those positive aspects that broadly speaking assert to triple and double that the deposit Pro-Fit. A few states of these bonds comprise of investing your own amount of money got in an upcoming match. Because of this that you ought to be aware of the states of the incentive to prevent disappointment and understand whenever you might receive your profit in the event of sales.
It will be always an exact catchy affair at the procedure for picking out your own games. You can desire to opt for those which you just love. There’s also a desire to choose those to provide you greater chances to acquire. You ought to tread closely on your means of picking the matches you’re going to soon be playing with.
When you choose an online casino then you must specify the goals of the match and also be more sensible in figuring out the potential of never winning whatever to devote a pleasing moment. Massive quantities of dollars may be gotten in addition too dropped. Simply by accepting the dangers that the players choose off the pressure and talk about with the pleasure of this adrenaline and game. Even the excess cash has to be performed also steer clear of clinics which could cause folks to become hooked.
Pros urge several suggestions and ways to overcome and acquire against the casino or trader at betting. It is wise to be controlled and discreet when utilizing several of the hints:• Board games. It’s critical to at all times possess some time management and also maybe not vice-versa. The absolute most proficient players reach the aim of amassing the amount they, in the beginning, created they cease, hold out somewhat and socialize again before being enticed to gamble and shed the things that they deserve. The following wise step is always to decide on online casinos having a couple of distractions using decorations that are jazzy. Lots of times entrepreneurs utilize videos using models together with lusty outfits to divert the interest of their absolute most specialists.• Roulette. It is suggested to wager past the likelihood “reddish/black”,”/ odd”,” low / lower”. Minimum and safe and sound revenue are all achieved.• Poker. Like card and blackjack matches, gamers must present their very best poker-face to better cover up their expressions and then fool the competition.With our guides and articles, you will find all the information you need to succeed in the online casinos.
submitted by ofagames to u/ofagames [link] [comments]

Looking for a rental apartment in Paris

In Winter 2019/2020, I moved here and looked for an apartment in Paris for the first time. The process was more complicated than I expected so I decided to summarize what I learned. My criteria going in were 1) within the périphérique and 2) under €1,600. I am employed, but I did not have relocation assistance from my employer, nor did I use an apartment-search agent.
I hope the following is useful for first-time renters in Paris. The first section goes over the rental market in Paris. The second section walks through the steps to finding an apartment in Paris. Finally, the appendices information on A) useful vocabulary, B) flat-sharing, C) recap of the flats I visited, and D) scooters.

Rental market in Paris

As of winter 2019/2020, average monthly rent is:
By Major Issue I mean:
Your (net) salary needs to be 3 times the amount of the rent. The salary can be the combined salary of the tenants (if say a family is moving in) or the salary of a guarantor. I've heard that foreigners and locals alike often fabricate the proof for this requirement.
Other than the rent, you pay
The people you'll deal with
Les agences (agencies)
Les particuliers (private landlords)
Les arnaquers (scammers)

Steps to finding an apartment in Paris

Step 1: Prepare your dossier
When you apply for an apartment, and sometimes when you request a viewing, the proprietor asks for your dossier. Each proprietor will specify what they want in the dossier, but it will be some combination of these documents:
I created a folder with all of the following and simply combine them in PDF as the need arises. I also annotated each page that was not in French with a short description in French. If you don't have something, find the closest substitute. I always tacked on a business photo and my LinkedIn. It's good practice to label everything clearly.
If you do not make 3x the rent in salary, you may need a garant (guarantor). I assume you would need the exact same documents above for each of your guarantors. As I mentioned above, I was surprised to find out later on that a lot of locals and foreigners alike forge their dossier. This can have major negative consequences down the line.
Step 2: Look for apartments
Figure out what you want and what is available in your budget by looking through a lot of listings. Call every single listing that you're interested in to schedule a visit. Email, voicemail, and texts are basically useless. The only way to get through is by calling during business hours. Start by browsing these:
You should know enough French to do the following: greeting / tell them which listing you're calling about, usually by quoting the rent amount and the square footage / provide personal details like name, email, phone number / provide apartment search parameters such as move-in date, budget, occupation, salary, marital status, furnished vs unfurnished. See Appendix A for vocabulary.
Step 3: Visit apartments
Once you've scheduled apartment visits, be organised and take notes before and after each visit. In Appendix D, I talk about how knowing how to drive a scooter can come in handy.
Spend some time in the quartier (neighborhood) before each visit. Many people like myself come to Paris with some romanticism in mind, and reality may not always match up. Some of the "sketchier" areas within Paris are not too bad if your reference point is a major US city. Below is my own take on the different neighborhoods after visiting 20+ apartments (see Appendix C). Very subjective, but relevant for my own apartment search:
During the visits, I look for:
Two things surprised me about the visits. The first is that there will probably be lots of other people. Proprietors may suggest a time like 19h50 (7:50pm) because they want to squeeze 6 people into one hour. They will also schedule multiple candidates at the same time. The second thing that surprised me is that you may get interviewed on the spot about your dossier and eligibility.
In one instance, I went up to the apartment at the same time as a charismatic French journalist looking for a pied-à-terre. After viewing the apartment (it was tiny), we were sat down and interviewed by the proprietor in the same room at the same time. The journalist did really well in the interview, not surprising considering that's basically his job. When we left, we met five more people waiting to view the apartment. Thus is the demand for a moderately desirable apartment in Paris.
Step 4: Apply, get accepted, sign, and move in
Apply: This is the easy part hopefully. The application process is simply handing in your dossier. If you’ve already submitted the dossier, then a quick text or call to the person who showed you the apartment saying that you’re interested and would like to proceed is enough. If you ask, and you should, they will tell you when they plan to make a decision.
Get accepted: The proprietor then takes all of the applications they received and make a choice. You should be informed either way. Assuming that you visited a spectrum of apartments, you should get some acceptances.
Next comes the part that confuses me the most. You know you applied to more than one apartment, and the proprietor knows that you applied to more than one, but somehow everyone wants you to make the decision immediately. This is very difficult to do if you are waiting for a response from a better apartment.
Sign: In any case, when you're accepted, you are notified via phone call or email. You should then receive the draft contract and schedule a rendez-vous (meeting) to sign. A legitimate contract will be quite a hefty document. I assumed that given how favourable to the tenant French law is, they can't screw me over too much. So I did not scrutinize the contract. You should expect to pay the deposit, the agency fees, and first month’s rent at the same time or immediately thereafter.
Everything from applying to signing can happen within 2 days and usually no more than a week. The only case where it would take longer is if you were on the “waitlist” and the person who got the apartment first did not want it.
Move in: You will arrange a move-in date with the proprietor. On that date, you should take an extremely detailed inventory of every corner. The person from whom I rented the apartment took more than 80 photos with me looking over and shared them with me.
As noted above, you will almost always pay for electricity and internet. I do not know about electricity as the owner set it up for me (you can ask to see if they are willing to help). For internet, there are two companies (SOSH and RED by SFR) who do not make you commit to a long-term contract. I chose one of them, had the router delivered, had the technician come in to make the necessary connections, and I was online. The last thing is tenant insurance, which you must set up from the moment you move in. For me, this was partly set up by the owner, but it seems pretty straightforward and the popular providers (AXA, MAAF, Allianz) have physical branches around the city.


Appendix A: Vocab for apartment hunting
Outside the apartment

Insider the apartment


Appendix B: Flat-sharing/colocation
Finding une colocation (a shared apartment) in Paris is a hassle, coming from someone who always had roommates before. It is an competitive process (40 people applying for 1 spot in one case). The non-competitive ones usually have something wrong. I use the travel website Couchsurfing, and the same types of creeps I see there I see on the colocation sites. Shared accommodations sometimes require more documents/guarantors than agencies.
If you're a student (there are student-only groups) or a girl (more creeps but you'll be eligible for flats with girls looking to share with other girls), you may have a different experience. Check out La Carte des Colocs to see what's available.

Appendix C: All the flats I visited in order
[Removed because I can't get tables to work]

Appendix D: Scooters
Not les trottinettes (Lime electric scooters), but the vespa-looking/baby motorcycles. Driving a scooter in Paris is not for the uninitiated, though probably no more dangerous than in any other European capitals.
If you decide to do it, it is hands-down the best way to navigate Paris. This is especially the case when you need to go from neighborhood to neighborhood to visit apartments. Two biggest benefits are filtering and parking. Being able to filter (lane-split) means that it is usually the fastest mode of transportation within Paris. In terms of parking you have 4 options:
  1. Covered parking: Search online for parking lots around Paris. They cost around 50 € per month (long-term). Recommended for overnight
  2. Motorcycle-specific parking space: Ideal and plentiful, but often crowded and littered with bicycles and Lime scooters. If parking over night, choose one that is brightly lit and be sure to remove all valuables. At a minimum use a u-lock
  3. Car parking space: Motorcycles and scooters can park in all roadside car parking spots for free, even if it says payant (paid parking). The downside is that cars often park with à touche-touche (bumping the cars behind and in front)
  4. Sidewalks: It's technically illegal to park on sidewalks but it is widely practiced. As long as it's temporary (not overnight), not blocking the main pedestrian thoroughfare, and the nearby dedicated motorcycle parking are full, parking on sidewalks seems tolerated.
You can share, rent, or buy a scooter. Shared scooters are currently offered by CityScoot. They are fast, cheap, and everywhere. Renting a scooter is recommended if you plan to use it a lot and is available from 22 € per day. Search location de scooter (scooter rental places). Buy a scooter if planning to use it for more than a month. Used scooters were somewhat hard to find. At first I wanted to buy from a dealer, but then I realized that many of their scooters are in poor condition and don't come with warranty. Because of that, consider buying from particuliers (individuals). Listings are found on LeBonCoin (French version of Craigslist; beware of scams) and Facebook.
In terms of specs, there are 3 key things. First, accessories like le top case and la jupe (leg covers) are very helpful. Second is engine size. 50cc is sufficient for Paris intra-muros (Paris proper), but they may struggle with pillions, starting off from a red light, and the speed on some of the boulevards. 125cc is the sweet spot. The 300cc tricycle are very common as well. I can't imagine riding a proper motorcycle with all the narrow streets, low speeds, and tight parking. Finally, due to Crit'Air (emissions control scheme in major French cities), the only two-wheeled vehicles technically allowed on the roads are those registered after June 2004. Gas-fueled vehicles in general are being phased out over time.

submitted by human_burrito to paris [link] [comments]

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